Letters of Complaint

[DDTempest]

The premise is simple:
Write a serious and professional complaint while pushing the envelope of absurdity and see how the contacted company responds. You can do this with actual products purchased by simply writing an unsatisfied review or go to the extreme. In general I would recommend writing a letter whenever possible. Nobody writes letters anymore so when a company receives something in the mail they take it seriously. I actually received a free year of text messaging and over $300 in credits for my cell phone when I sent a letter of complaint a couple years back. Most companies will send you some coupons just for writing them!

Just copy and paste your letter into the thread and update it if you receive a response!

I like to start things off with a bang so I offer this letter submitted to Pepsi via their website just moments ago:

Hello Good Sirs,
I want to commend you gentlemen on the rebranding of your entire line of soft drinks. While I may have gone a different way in terms of design, the new packaging certainly does catch the eye and give the impression that times are a changin'. Unfortunately for my Grandmother, not everyone is real keen on the new packaging.

Last week some time, my dearest Grandmother Agness went to the grocery store to buy her staple beverage: Caffeine Free Diet Mountain Dew. I personally find the concept of caffeine free diet beverages to be counterproductive, but that is neither here nor there. The problem arose when Agness could not decipher her old favorite among the new sleek packaging, resulting in her purchasing regular Mountain Dew. Unfortunately Grandma Agness has two major health problems: diabetes and something messed up with her heart.

Well I suppose I should say "had" two major health problems as the combination of caffeine and high amounts of sugar caused her to experience irregular heartbeats and pass out at the top of the stairs and fall breaking her neck and back in several places. While she probably had it coming, I just thought you guys should know that such dramatic overhauls in product packaging can confuse less capable customers and do have devastating effects on families.

Sincerely,
Theodore Sandquist II