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Old 04-12-2009, 12:12 AM   #1 (permalink)
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Default Polar Bear Mauls Woman in Zoo...with awesome picture



BERLIN, Germany (CNN) -- A polar bear attacked a woman at Berlin Zoo Friday afternoon after she climbed a fence and jumped into its habitat during feeding time, police said Saturday.

One adult polar bit her several times after she plunged into the moat, police said.

Zoo workers tossed rescue rings toward the woman to hoist her out and distract polar bears swimming nearby, said Goerg Gebhard, a Berlin police officer.

"They saved her life," Gebhard told CNN.

The woman was severely injured and was being treated at a hospital, police said.

It's unclear why the woman entered the bear habitat, but police issued her a citation for trespassing.



source.

Last edited by Mr. Blonde; 04-12-2009 at 12:14 AM. Reason: source
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Old 04-12-2009, 02:01 AM   #2 (permalink)
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hahhaha, take that, fat bitch! Stupid whore deserved it.
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Old 04-12-2009, 02:39 AM   #3 (permalink)
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source now has a video of the attack, and it's fucking awesome.
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Old 04-12-2009, 03:14 AM   #4 (permalink)
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They should have let her get eaten. Dumb enough to jump in there? Dumb enough to be a nice treat for some polar bears.
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Old 04-12-2009, 03:42 AM   #5 (permalink)
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What an idiot. I love how she couldn't lift herself out b/c she's so fat. Stupid, fat, bitch.
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Old 04-12-2009, 05:11 AM   #6 (permalink)
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I feel bad....































FOR THE FUCKING POLAR BEAR! Fat bitch probably tasted like fat bitch fuck sweat.

Putting the sensual in non-consensual.
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Old 04-12-2009, 05:55 AM   #7 (permalink)
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If I were her, I would concentrate on bearing the shame from being so stupid.

Quote:
You often seem to think that the lowest-hanging-fruit makes you some sort of comedy genius. You're just not a good person. You're spiteful, constantly negative, and bring others down to make yourself feel better. I just don't have room for that.
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Old 04-12-2009, 09:01 AM   #8 (permalink)
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Wow... this woman really must like polar bears!!

:-D
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Old 04-12-2009, 09:01 AM   #9 (permalink)
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Wow... this woman really must like polar bears!!

:-D
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Old 04-12-2009, 11:17 AM   #10 (permalink)
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UB must really like DP(double posting).
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Old 04-12-2009, 11:56 AM   #11 (permalink)
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That's not the only kind of DP I like!

(Ninjaface, do you see what I did there??!)
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Old 04-12-2009, 11:57 AM   #12 (permalink)
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I like how the polar bear still manages to look cute while mauling the fat lady.

#YOLO
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Old 04-13-2009, 02:44 AM   #13 (permalink)
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DP CAN ALSO MEAN DOUBLE PENETRATION.
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Old 04-13-2009, 05:18 AM   #14 (permalink)
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Maybe he just wanted to remove her clothes and see her bare.


The basis of our governments being the opinion of the people, the very first object should be to keep that right; and were it left to me to decide whether we should have a government without newspapers, or newspapers without a government, I should not hesitate a moment to prefer the latter. But I should mean that every man should receive those papers and be capable of reading them.
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Old 04-13-2009, 07:42 AM   #15 (permalink)
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She couldn't bear to see such a noble animal in captivity.
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Old 04-13-2009, 12:58 PM   #16 (permalink)
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Interesting seeing the polar opposite opinions in this thread.

You see what I did there?
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Old 04-13-2009, 01:13 PM   #17 (permalink)
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Old 04-13-2009, 01:24 PM   #18 (permalink)
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These lame jokes are unbearable


Edit : This needs to be captioned






edit2 : It has


Last edited by Dent; 04-13-2009 at 01:51 PM.
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Old 04-13-2009, 03:07 PM   #19 (permalink)
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You guys suck. You have to make different jokes, you can't just have five people using a varition of "bear it." I'm pretty fucking disappointed.

Quote:
You often seem to think that the lowest-hanging-fruit makes you some sort of comedy genius. You're just not a good person. You're spiteful, constantly negative, and bring others down to make yourself feel better. I just don't have room for that.
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Old 04-13-2009, 03:16 PM   #20 (permalink)
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Apparently a polar bear mauled a German woman at Berlin Zoo after she jumped the fence into his enclosure.

Nice to see the Poles getting their own back after all these years!!
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Old 04-13-2009, 04:27 PM   #21 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by DDTempest View Post
You guys suck. You have to make different jokes, you can't just have five people using a varition of "bear it." I'm pretty fucking disappointed.
You could say the lack of originality is... ...
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Unbearable

#YOLO
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Old 04-13-2009, 05:42 PM   #22 (permalink)
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This thread is all sorts of awesome.
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Old 04-13-2009, 05:51 PM   #23 (permalink)
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I wonder if the worker that saved her had a beard.
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Old 04-13-2009, 06:26 PM   #24 (permalink)
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When asked how she ended up in the pit, she replied, "I was looking for the penguins and I guess I just lost my bearings."

Quote:
You often seem to think that the lowest-hanging-fruit makes you some sort of comedy genius. You're just not a good person. You're spiteful, constantly negative, and bring others down to make yourself feel better. I just don't have room for that.
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Old 04-13-2009, 06:28 PM   #25 (permalink)
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At first they were nice, but then got angry and attacked ... I guess they were bipolar bears!

Quote:
You often seem to think that the lowest-hanging-fruit makes you some sort of comedy genius. You're just not a good person. You're spiteful, constantly negative, and bring others down to make yourself feel better. I just don't have room for that.
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