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#254 (permalink) |
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Guest
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Have Onstar? Use it as a free GPS system.
http://members.cox.net/onstar/ |
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#256 (permalink) | |
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Quote:
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#258 (permalink) |
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Why a derp?
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I swear I've posted this before...but I don't see it. Even so, I'm sure a lot of you have already tapped this resource.
Anyway...for some of the funniest text on the net, visit bash.org. The top 100...and then 101-200 are absolutely priceless. A few bars of gold just to ensure that you'll actually go... <NES> lol <NES> I download something from Napster <NES> And the same guy I downloaded it from starts downloading it from me when I'm done <NES> I message him and say "What are you doing? I just got that from you" <NES> "getting my song back fucker" *** Topic in #doghouse is 'Our hearts are extended to the 17 victims of the recent internet fraud' * Anubis has joined #doghouse <Anubis> what fraud? <Kadmium> You haven't heard about it? <Anubis> no? <Kadmium> You can read the full story at http://www.tubgirl.com <Anubis> omg wtf! *** Kadmium changes topic to 'Our hearts are extended to the 18 victims of the recent internet fraud' AngryGackt: hey Kagato: yo AngryGackt: did you hear about lindze's dad? Kagato: ..nikki.... Kagato: you just like.. Kagato: scared me... so bad... Kagato: cuz when I first read that it looked like "did you hear that Lindze's dead?" AngryGackt: OH Kagato: I swear my heart jumped into my throat. AngryGackt: NO AngryGackt: gahhhh Kagato: I was chewing on my heart and freaking out until I reread it. AngryGackt: jeeeeessus Kagato: ........>_< AngryGackt: *flails* Kagato: what happened to her dad? ::relaxes:: AngryGackt: He's dead. Kagato: ........ [edit] Honestly...tell me that last piece isn't the funniest thing you've ever read. I laugh hysterically everytime I reread it. [/edit] [ January 18, 2005, 01:43 AM: Message edited by: Orgazmo ] |
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#259 (permalink) |
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Emperor Meow
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this is definitely one of my favorites...
<[BAC]Draxon|TWL> "The animals will hear!" bellowed the ear licking penguin as the awesomely endowed midget sucked her oozing charlies and plugged his purple middle leg into her festering cunt. <[BAC]Draxon|TWL> oops <[BAC]Draxon|TWL> wrong window <d|syztem> what the FUCK edit: <Kazz> Do vampires have anuses? Cause that's why I wouldn't let this kid invade a vampire's anus in this RPG, right, I was GMing, and his character was an Anus Shade, with the power to possess and control the anuses of people and animals.. and I figured that vampires don't have anuses. <Zaratustra> a vampire's anus is present, but non-working. <Zaratustra> like a network card without the appropriate driver. <Kazz> Wow. You're the biggest dork on Earth. <Sharkey> And you're DMing an rpg with Anus Shades. [ January 18, 2005, 03:24 AM: Message edited by: THEINCREDIBLEdork ] |
Band teachers always have a larger than life persona - ID
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#260 (permalink) |
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I WURRVV UUUUUU
Join Date: Jan 2004
Location: Phoenix. FML
Posts: 15,932
Internets: 116691
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<SRG> Metallica sold out in 45 mins :/
<NotOneOfUs> Yeah I know. <NotOneOfUs> Oh wait <NotOneOfUs> You mean, like, a concert? <SRG> yes |
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FUN WITH QUOTE MINING! Quote:
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#261 (permalink) |
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I WURRVV UUUUUU
Join Date: Jan 2004
Location: Phoenix. FML
Posts: 15,932
Internets: 116691
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Does this look familiar to anyone else? I don't know who copied from who...
#261931 +(2659)- [X] Phoenix> Dude, wanna hear a fucked up story? Phoenix> So, Im at the usual weekend frat parties and i've been talking to this girl for the majority of the night. Phoenix> Anyway I ended up going back with her to her dorm. About another 8shots later, we end up fooling around on her bed. Phoenix> So about 10min's into her giving me head, I had to drop the fattest shit in my life. Phoenix> All my meals were followed by 3tsp of metamucil so I could get lots of fiber in me to combat the carbs a litte. Anyway im holdin my #2 in and finally it goes away. We both end up passing out on her bed, she's butt naked and im in my boxers. Phoenix> I wake up to piss and I find myself covered in shit. It was all over the bed,sheets,etc.... Im freakin out so I did the most horrible thing in the world. Phoenix> She's sleeping with her back towards me, so I take my boxers off, scoop up some shit and gently smear it on the inside of her butt, her lower back, and a little on the back of her hammies. Phoenix> I get dressed and leave... This poor girl is gonna think she did it. I didnt know what else to do though. I have no clue what im gonna do when I end up running into her. EDIT: Here we are. [ January 18, 2005, 10:34 AM: Message edited by: Mr. Blonde ] |
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FUN WITH QUOTE MINING! Quote:
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#263 (permalink) |
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Wee.
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Bonsai Kitten
"Method: At only a few weeks of age, a kitten's bones have not yet hardened and become osseous. They are extremely soft and springy. In fact, if you take a week-old kitten and throw it to the floor, it will actually bounce! We do not recommend that you try this at home. The kitten may bounce under the furniture and be difficult to retrieve, as well as covered in unsightly household dust. However, the flexibility of the kitten's skeleton means that if the bones are gently warped at this early age, they can be molded into any desired shape. At Bonsai Kitten, we achieve this by placing the kitten into a rigid vessel soon after birth, and allowing the young cat to grow out its formative time entirely within this container. The kitten essentially grows into the shape of the vessel! Once the cat is fully developed, it is removed (or the vessel broken to remove it!), producing the lovable, furry pet you've always wanted, but it remains in the shape you've always dreamed of! There is virtually no limit to the eventual shape of your pet." Ever wanted a square shaped kitten? Of course you have. ![]() |
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#264 (permalink) |
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Why a derp?
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The Face Transformer
This thing kicks ass. Upload a pic that has your face in it (preferably as a subject), show this thing where your main features are, and let it transform you into other ethnicities and even artistic styles. Me as an old man ![]() Me as a terrorist ![]() [ January 24, 2005, 04:27 PM: Message edited by: Orgazmo ] |
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#268 (permalink) |
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Senior Member
Join Date: Feb 2002
Location: Indiana
Posts: 3,847
Internets: 66431
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How Stuff Works This is a very useful website. If you ever want to know how anything works, go here.
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#275 (permalink) |
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It's in the breeze...
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If you are wondering where I got the 'Kick-Ass Video of the Day', www.phun.org
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the composer just went deaf.
the singer lost his breathe, in the glow of the crowd. the dancer's on a crutch. the writer drank to much. the director lost his touch. In the glow of the crowd. can you resist the urge to burn the script we wrote? |
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