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Orgazmo 12-13-2013 11:24 AM

Philip Rivers
When I was born, the doctor panicked. I was immediately diagnosed as a jaundiced infant that was asphyxiating. It took a nurse stepping in to get Doc to stop trying to "resuscitate" me. She pointed out that the yellow and blue covering my skin was actually body paint. I was a chargers fan from my first cell, you see. When I grew arms, I painted myself so that, upon arrival, I would be known for what I was. From the womb to the world, I was born in Blue and Yellow. True story.

As a diehard Chargers fan, I face a decent bit of scrutiny. Nearly all of that comes from folks not understanding how a person could support Philip Rivers, a man that many believe to be a huge douche. The problem, of course, is the portrayal of the man--a man that is actually a gentle soul with a kind heart. His passion oftentimes garners him persecution. In a rare moment last night, though, he was granted ten minutes of airtime following a smooth victory over the Scoundrel Broncos of Denver.

Gentlemen, whether you love, think you hate, or are entirely indifferent of the man, I would urge you to spend a few minutes staring into the soul of the true Philip Rivers by watching his post-game interview. link:

San Diego Chargers quarterback Philip Rivers: 'We knew nobody gave us a chance' - NFL Videos

Direct video file link:

THEINCREDIBLEdork 12-13-2013 12:00 PM

I saw the post game interview last night. Never seen that side of Rivers. I don't know what is in my heart yet for this man.

It's hard for me to change perspective on a man I've despised for years.

Orgazmo 12-13-2013 12:48 PM

That's just it, sir. You haven't really despised him, you've despised the very limited view of him that has been shown to you. I mean, did you even know what his voice sounded like before hearing that interview? Sure, mics catch some shouting on the field, but have you listened to him have a genuine talk?

Now that the curtain is being pulled back a little bit, we can bask in His true glory.

Johnny Richter 12-13-2013 02:14 PM

One time I was searching for rape porn and I clicked this link, but I was redirected to a video of Phillip Rivers sucking five dicks at once. I was both disgusted and disappointed, much like I am when watching Phillip Rivers play football.

Orgazmo 12-13-2013 02:44 PM

Link plz?

Johnny Richter 12-13-2013 10:40 PM

I think that would violate the nibbles rules.

On a serious note, can you explain how you came to like this team so much. I mean, Phillip rivers really is a cocksucker. No matter how you look at it. The guy's a dick.

Orgazmo 12-14-2013 12:32 PM

I was born loving the Chargers. It's in my DNA.

Cocktooth 12-15-2013 02:52 AM

I love Rivers, the guy who talked shit to Colts fans while on a torn ACL. And I think this interview is along those lines. Its just the shit he says in the middle that have me on the fence. Luck, and Da'rick Rodgers better have a game today!

THEINCREDIBLEdork 12-15-2013 12:52 PM

I've decided I still hate Rivers.

I'm also starting to doubt your story. How did you get paint inside your mother's womb?

Full disclosure: I'm not a colts fan.

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