01-23-2009, 12:23 AM | #1 (permalink) | |
Ahoy Fuckbag
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Letters of Complaint
The premise is simple:
Write a serious and professional complaint while pushing the envelope of absurdity and see how the contacted company responds. You can do this with actual products purchased by simply writing an unsatisfied review or go to the extreme. In general I would recommend writing a letter whenever possible. Nobody writes letters anymore so when a company receives something in the mail they take it seriously. I actually received a free year of text messaging and over $300 in credits for my cell phone when I sent a letter of complaint a couple years back. Most companies will send you some coupons just for writing them! Just copy and paste your letter into the thread and update it if you receive a response! I like to start things off with a bang so I offer this letter submitted to Pepsi via their website just moments ago: Quote:
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01-23-2009, 01:22 AM | #2 (permalink) |
Spice Master
Join Date: Jan 2004
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bahahahahha! I don't see myself doing this but who knows. I wonder how they'll respond.
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Psychedelics are illegal not because a loving government is concerned that you may jump out of a third story window. Psychedelics are illegal because they dissolve opinion structures and culturally laid down models of behavior and information processing.
― Terence McKenna |
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01-23-2009, 01:55 AM | #3 (permalink) |
Gangnam Style
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I had a situation with my local casino bowling alley in which they advertise their bar specials to be from 11 pm - 2 am. The past two times I have gone in there, the bar hasn't even been open. My first visit was at 12:30 AM and the second at 1 AM. I expressed my displeasure and actually got the manager of food and beverage to come all the way to the bowling alley to hear my complaint. All she ended up saying was that she would make sure somebody would be there during those posted hours in the future. I was quite disappointed to find that she didn't even OFFER any compensation for my complaint. There are five other competing casino bowling alleys which all offer the same $1 bowling, $1 drafts after midnight. What can we conjure up here, guys?
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01-23-2009, 10:55 AM | #4 (permalink) |
Ahoy Fuckbag
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Write your own damn letter slacker =P
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01-23-2009, 01:40 PM | #7 (permalink) | |
Senior Member
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*Dislikes ham
Chee's email to a porn site.
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Putting the sensual in non-consensual.
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01-24-2009, 02:50 AM | #8 (permalink) |
Ahoy Fuckbag
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I am in no way claiming that I am the first to write asshole letters to businesses for amusement. I believe at Ball State that creative writing nonfiction 2 even had an assignment to do just this, I am simply trying to bring some activities that will inspire you gentlemen to greatness, or at least provide myself with entertainment.
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01-27-2009, 06:44 AM | #9 (permalink) | ||
Ahoy Fuckbag
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***UPDATE***
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01-27-2009, 10:19 AM | #11 (permalink) |
Spice Master
Join Date: Jan 2004
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lol. nothing like canned responses to emails that you didn't actually read.
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Psychedelics are illegal not because a loving government is concerned that you may jump out of a third story window. Psychedelics are illegal because they dissolve opinion structures and culturally laid down models of behavior and information processing.
― Terence McKenna |
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01-27-2009, 01:21 PM | #12 (permalink) | |
Senior Member
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Are you seriously whining about a casino bowling alley??? Jesus, Felix. I swear you have the highest estrogen level of anyone one this board, ANYONE. | |
Nubblies: If we put up with Felix, we will put up with you too.
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01-27-2009, 01:44 PM | #13 (permalink) |
Gangnam Style
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Shaw, I have no idea why you are saying what you are. If it is supposed to be some kind of a slam on casino bowling alleys, you'd be surprised to know they are the best in Vegas and this specific one hosts PBA events. If you're saying I have a high estrogen level because a bar advertises specials and hours and then aren't even open, then you're (dare I say it again) a fucking idiot. If it is for some other reason, please let me know.
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01-27-2009, 05:49 PM | #14 (permalink) | |
Ahoy Fuckbag
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And my response, hopefully this results in some coupons or something!
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01-27-2009, 07:11 PM | #18 (permalink) | ||
Ahoy Fuckbag
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From above:
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01-27-2009, 07:14 PM | #19 (permalink) |
Senior Member
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I mean, don't get me wrong DDT, A for effort and everything, but like D for the idea. I just kind of view it as being a dick and wasting people's time who haven't done anything to you to deserve it.
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01-27-2009, 09:22 PM | #22 (permalink) |
Ahoy Fuckbag
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You've clearly never worked in any form of customer service that involves people's names. As a rule of thumb, chances are that any customer that has a problem has an 80% chance of having a ridiculous name.
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01-27-2009, 09:25 PM | #24 (permalink) | |
Been told twice
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