Mr. Blonde Goes to South Korea

[Mr. Blonde]

Well hullo gentlemen (and the few ladies. ps show us ur titz). As some of you may have picked up from a couple tidbits in one or two other threads, at the end of February I will be departing the land of free once again to teach English in South Korea. No, I have no idea how to teach small children, nor do I speak a word of Korean. Details, gentlemen, details.

I have been accepted to a nice little private school in Incheon, which is the third largest city in SK and only about an hour away from Seoul, and actually still consists of part of the metropolitan area of Seoul because of this. The bad news is is that i'm only about 30 miles away from the South/North Korean border, which means I could very likely be fucked if shit starts to hit the fan. However, there could also be good news if that situation came about as well.

I am doing this for several reasons;

Firstly I've stayed in Phoenix for entirely too long. I only came here on a whim because I wanted to get out of Indiana anyways.

Secondly, I'm not really going to teach as much as I am to travel. I really miss and love traveling.

Thirdly, I really love Asian chicks. Best head/sex I ever had was from two separate Asian chicks; that's convincing enough for me.

And Fourthly, It's actually a decent living for doing something like teaching something that comes naturally to me. My class hours are only 4PM-10PM, which is pretty fucking sweet as it gives me most of the day to either sleep in and fuck around. Incheon is connected directly to Seoul through the subway, so that could make for some good weekend trips, as well as the entire country of South Korea only being the size of Indiana anyways, so I can get anywhere within a matter of hours.

It's not all roses though, my precious friends. After reading through the contract it definitely seems like they will be working me hard for my money; but I don't see that being a problem. With what they're paying me, (which isn't a HUGE amount hourly, but still pretty good for such a job) on top of covering my housing, as well as letting me do this in the first place, I think me following by a few very strict guidelines (mainly regarding being half hour early every day and not fucking around while at work) is well worth it and more than fair.

The main thing, however, that i'm looking forward to about this trip is what i'm planning on doing after my first year of teaching. I may continue teaching, pending I don't hate it, but i'm taking 3-6 months off after this first year to go on this little trip:



I've been planning it for a while now, and it should be pretty sweet. I plan to spend as much of it as I can on the ground, either walking, busfare, train, or hitchhiking, but i'm aware there are a few spots i'll have to fly obviously. From everybody i've heard though you can get flights pretty cheap in Asia/Europe if you know the right places to book (GWB, HCW, Dent, Ironic Mustache, i'm looking at you). I eventually want to end up in London (GWB, think you'll still be there a year and a half from now?) before I take my next step.


It's possible i'll move back to the states, but right now I can't see me doing such a thing after traveling so much. I'm trying to get to all 7 continents by the time I turn 30 (which gives me about 5 years), so after that I might teach english (once again, pending I don't mind it) in South America for a while and while i'm there save up for a trip to Antarctica.



Alas, never fear Nubblites! I will still be here for you! I know my biggest fans like Active, ID, and F3lix will miss me terribly, so I plan on purchasing a laptop sometime in the next couple weeks and will have internet access in my semi furnished studio apartment, although god knows what they're gonna charge me for it. SK is the "most wired nation in the world", so can't be that expensive.


Anyways, that's that. Any tips from anyone on visiting the far east are more than appreciated.

[Cocktooth]

I have a basketball player/foreign exchange student from that area. I'm sure he would love to take you on a tour, plus teach you to get into triple threat position!!

[DJ FC]

Blonde, there is a good chance (75%+) that I will be visiting you in Korea. Flights from Europe are cheaper for some reason from what I've seen.

And yes, you can stay at my place in London. Except you should come to London as your first leg in Europe for a couple reasons:

London is one of the best places to fly into and out of Europe.
I'm in London
We can go drink in Germany and Ireland

[Cocktooth]

Originally Posted by George W. Bush

Blonde, there is a good chance (75%+) that I will be visiting you in Korea. Flights from Europe are cheaper for some reason from what I've seen.

And yes, you can stay at my place in London. Except you should come to London as your first leg in Europe for a couple reasons:

London is one of the best places to fly into and out of Europe.
I'm in London
We can go drink in Germany and Ireland

GWB, you are so Worldly.

[tonguegina]

I have a friend in Seoul doing that same thing. Most of his students are actually businessmen, but he's had fun with it. He's in his second year right now. It seems like a pretty sweet gig. I'm sure you'll have a good time with it.

[THEINCREDIBLEdork]

Well, you're actually doing it, Blonde. Congratulations. Have fun.

[DDTempest]

Why Thailand? Why Afghanistan? Why Israel? Maybe I am just a conspiracy theorist here, but you took out a large insurance policy on your life and named me as a beneficiary and are intending to get killed in one of these countries?

I'm honored.

[Mr. Blonde]

I havent decided how i'm handling Pakistan/Afghanistan/Iraq/Iran yet, possibly leaving Iran completely out of it, but thats just where the line went through. Regardless, I definitely want to visit Israel, i've heard its beautiful.

[Ugly Bastard]

Afghanistan and Iran = probably not a good idea whatsoever. I'm sure you'll figure it out though.

Also, color me very interested in visiting you in SK at some point. I know a poker player who moved there after landing a seven figure score. Said the girls there are amazing and go nuts for American boys.

[Pliedes]

My friend Erin just got back from a year in Korea. She didn't really like it, but then again she's a girl. I also know the gentleman that Tonguegina speaks of- the whole thing is a good fit for him. We could probably pass along some contact information if you're interested.

One of my best friends is teaching in Japan right now, and while he likes the overall experience he has been overworked. He started out teaching a few elementary classes, but after a few months, he had classes morning, afternoon, and night....he barely sleeps anymore. You're at the mercy of whatever program you enter, so make sure you do your research beforehand.

Sounds like you've thought it all out, though. This could be an amazing experience for you...I expect a detailed travelogue (with pics!).

One more thing...make sure you have a handle on your drinking. Once the distance and loneliness sets in you might start hitting the bottle a bit too hard. Punching car windows and other such mayhem probably won't go over too well

[tonguegina]

Neither will kicking the side view mirrors off of cars.

[Dent]

Just been told by me jew-friend that going across iran to israel isn't legal, but I understand that you haven't mapped a flight path.
Also, Afghan? the war will be stepping up there over the next year, I really don't see it being a good idea.
I'll be visiting Israel at some point next year, if you visit there i'm game.
GWB is probably right in starting in london, travel up north (welcome to stay at mine) then ferry to ireland.

I think DDtemptest is a little confused with thailand/israel, I've been to thailand, albeit the tourist area, and it's all good.
Same with Israel, its probably the most pro-american country, besides the UK.

[Mr. Blonde]

Yeah i was confused about that comment too. Thailand is one of the biggest tropical vacation destinations in that hemisphere i'm pretty sure and Israel is definitely one of the US's best allies.

[DDTempest]

Well Israel may or may not be involving itself in a region wide war by that point and well Thailand I figured you were just going to have sex with 11 year olds.

[DJ FC]

If you plan on going to Arab countries, do not let the Israelis stamp your passport as you may be denied admission. I know Iran will not let you into the country if you have any Israel stamps...

[Beebs]

Teaching small Korean children you say?

[THEINCREDIBLEdork]

and where have you been?

[Beebs]

Went to Denver, pain in the ass to start sorting through old posts. Working on new avatar.

[Mr. Blonde]

Fuck, it seems like forever ago that I posted this. That being said, tomorrow morning 6AM Indiana time I start my journey. Once I get to San Francisco its about a 12 and a half hour flight and by the time I land in South Korea, exchange my money, somehow find the shuttle for my hotel and check in, it should be about 8 or 9 at night (i think) on Saturday night. I'm definitely going to be

A. Try to find some other Americans or English speakers

B. If that fails go online and find some English speaking hangout bars

C. Go there and meet some helpers.

Then I have all day Sunday to myself before training starts Monday morning, so i'll probably just wander around Seoul and shit.


Anyways, thats the update. Cheers dudes.

[Ugly Bastard]

Nice one man. How much did the flight end up costing? If you pull Korean ass within the first 48 hours, I'm visiting by May.

[Mr. Blonde]

780 through some travel agent i was referred to by my recruiter. we'll see about 48 hours. pending my roommate in the hotel for the first week during training isn't a douchebag about me bringing home bitches, i'm sure gonna try.

[f3lix]

Eiffel Tower some bitch

[Dent]

Did your roommate apply for the same thing? he american?
780 seems a little expensive for a single flight, you can go to hong kong for $400 through orbitz.

[SittinOnDubsWGW]

Sounds like you got it planned out decent, good luck out there and have fun dude.

780 doesn't seem that bad to travel across the globe. I'm guessing your 400 dollar figure is leaving from Europe?

[Ugly Bastard]

Chicago to South Korea for $780 buying your ticket just one week in advance sounded like a steal to me.

[SittinOnDubsWGW]

Originally Posted by Ugly Bastard

Chicago to South Korea for $780 buying your ticket just one week in advance sounded like a steal to me.

This is more along the line of my thoughts as well.

I would've expected to be about twice what he spent. But I haven't looked much into flights other than San Diego, Oklahoma, Texas, Vegas and Ohio recently. haha

[Mr. Blonde]

Alright, so I checked into my hotel in downtown Seoul about 3 hours ago, and I've spent most of that kinda unpacking, showering, and talking to my roommate, who is American. Or was, rather; he has been here training for a week already so he's moving in with one of his friends from training class. We're only in the hotel while we're training/until we get a place of our own, but its pretty nice.

I was starving and thirsty when I got settled so I went to a convenience store downstairs and literally...EVERYTHING...is in Korean. I mean sure I expected that but its just different to see it with your own eyes. I got water, potato chips and a snickers bar, pretty much cause those were the only things that I could tell what they were.

My now ex roommate and his friends were thinking about going out, but now its almost 1AM Korean time, I considered going out but they haven't come by yet, and I'm still kinda fucked from jetlag, I think i'm just gonna get some sleep. Some notes:

-There are hot Asian bitches EVERYWHERE. Granted I love asians but still...they wear short skirts like its going out of style, too. Its awesome.

-My toilet is awesome. First off, the seats are heated, which is pretty much amazing. Also, there is a bidet, which I know us Americans aren't all that used to, but we probably should be as its awesome and a hell of a lot cleaner. This one has all sorts of buttons to move the spray, a massage function which pulses the water all up on your taint, and also controls the temperature and pressure of the water. I probably won't have one of these once I move into my apt, but its awesome while I have it.

[Mr. Blonde]

Also: Awesome.

[THEINCREDIBLEdork]

Shit I had no idea bidet technology has progressed this far. I may move to korea just for butthole pleasures.

[Dent]

Are you telling us that the weird ass asian technology that you see on dodgy TV channels is real?
First time I saw a bidet I thought it was a beer cooler.
Are there many tourists there? if not I wouldn't expect any other languages

[Mr. Blonde]

shit you not, one of the hardest weeks of my life just ended. long story short, i'll embellish later, we didn't have a job (despite signing a contract for employment before we left) before coming over here. we had to pass this week of insanely intense training before we "officially" got hired...otherwise all costs are on us AND we don't have a job...in which case we would probably have to go home.

That aside, I punched a few walls so they knew I meant business and passed this week. Bus is picking me up in about 15 to move about 45 minutes to the area i'll be teaching in/my apartment (i've been in a hotel for training all week). That being said, I probably won't have internet for a bit. It'd be nice if I did...but preparing for the worst. have to get my alien registration card before I can get utilities I think..so I might have to pull a Pliedes for a bit.

update soon outlining whole past week

[SittinOnDubsWGW]

congrats on passing. Have fun and continue punching walls til they finally realize, you aren't having it anyone's way but your own.

[Mr. Blonde]

Alright, so Friday night: got driven to Yeonsu, Incheon, Yeonsu being a district of Incheon, which is a suburb of Seoul (analogy: a chinatown in a suburb of chicago) where I will be teaching starting tomorrow. Got taken straight to my school, luggage and all, and met my director (principal and COO...its a private school so a business as well) and the other teachers I will be working with. There are about 12 at my school, and 2 of them are even from Indiana...pretty cool. While they were finishingu p teaching (we teach from 4:30-10:30 PM) I got driven to my apartment by someone who honestly seems to be a mafioso driver. He doesn't speak any English and he showed up in a suit just to help me with my luggage and take me to my apt. Pretty nice guy though. My apartment is...interesting. I thought it was small, but compared to some of the others i've seen its actually pretty spacious.



sucky part is, there is like no furniture. My mattress and a small desk...thats about it. So i'll have to acquire some of that

Another interesting part; the bathrooms.



They consist of a toilet, sink, shower, and in some instances (such as mine), the washing machine. At first I was like, what the fuck, but apparently almost all korean bathrooms are like this in the apartments similar to mine. There is a drain in the floor that the sink, washing machine, and obviously shower drain into. That hose looking thing on the wall is the showerhead. Its actually not bad, not like I spend tons of time in the bathroom anyways...just...different.


Anyways, after I changed and got settled in a bit, I walked back to my school which is only about a 15 minute walk away, and met up with my teachers again who were leaving. They said something about some St. Patty's Day festival in downtown Seoul they were going to tomorrow, and I figured it was either go to that and get drunk or stay in my apartment all weekend with no friends, no cell phone and bored. Obviously I opted for the festival.

It was very fun, but not very Korean. I took a bunch of pictures and have caught some heat from some of my friends already (cause its basically getting drunk with a bunch of other white people), but it was also a great friend-building day. I'm definitely here to experience the culture, but everybody in our group of about 20 people that day are all teaching at schools in my area of Incheon, Yeonsu...which means that for the next year i'll have people to hang out with, or call, or whatever here.

The good news is that it seems that most of the people who were out yesterday are fucking awesome, and not crybaby fuckup bitches that about half of my training group was. By the way, the 35 year old ex mil guy ended up going home. The girls in the group are cool, but no real talent as far as i'm concerned, plus its probably better not to shit where I eat anyways. The guys are all very fucking cool, a good mix of American/Canadian/English. These two British guys, Ricky and Richard, like best friends since they were kids, are fucking hilarious, and some of the Canadians are some of the biggest partiers i've ever seen. So it was a good day to make friends for sure. A lot of them basically told me "this will be your life over the next year"...which I don't know what to think about yet. Some of them were like, "it's basically like extended college, except you have more free time, more money and don't have to worry about tests"

We'll see I guess. I didn't really come here to party 24/7, but some of them seem like they'd be easy to talk into going to some temples in Southern South Korea or Japan for the weekend instead of spending the whole thing binging. Seems to me that most of us really only party when there isn't shit else to do.


EDIT: Also, It seems a few of the teachers I work with have dogs...or cat...or, as you can see here:



You can even buy bunnies in the subway. She wouldn't sell for 10,000 won though, so we went elsewhere. I guess one of the brits is buying one as we speak. Anyways, point is, is that I'll probably get a dog while i'm out here. Apparently its not a big deal at all to have them in your house...I will probably wait a month or two to get comfortable though before I start doing that. Would be pretty cool to have a dog or hell even cat out here though.

Also, here is a picture of the view of my room...its weird though, I have a "balcony" so to speak...but you have to go outside through the window to get to it...and theres not very much space. So basically from the outside in, its window, about a 2 foot wide balcony, then a frosted window, then my apartment. Here is the weird window thing:



And here is the view. Not horrible...but I'd have to open up the frosted window first to see it. So I probably won't be looking out here much.

[SittinOnDubsWGW]

looks like you're doing well already over there. I definitely say good job on going out for the St. Pattys day thing, even if its not very korean and you're hanging out with white people.

I think anyone that gives you shit for that, is retarded. Obvious good to make friends quickly, never know when you might need some help or just are flat out bored.

[Ugly Bastard]

Nice one Blonde. I might suggest leaning towards not getting a dog. They're cute and fun and all, but also a ton of responsibility. Maybe you want to go out for a drink right after work, but you can't because you have to go home and take the dog out. Maybe he barks when you're gone and the neighbors hate you for it. Plus the little fuckers cost quite a lot of money. It's not a very socially acceptable thing to say: but dogs, like kids, are a huge pain in the ass that probably aren't worth it in the long run.

Get a cat.

[DJ FC]

Get a cat and start marinating it immediately.

[f3lix]

Agree with UB, thumbs down on doggie

[Mr. Blonde]

duly noted. maybe i'll settle for a bunny after all.

[THEINCREDIBLEdork]

dude, get a cat. the bunny will shit all over the place.

actually i'd recommend not getting anything, if you are planning on traveling a lot you want to minimize things that tie you down. tbh a cat wouldn't be very happy in that small of an appartment.

pretty nice appartment btw.

[Mr. Blonde]

yeah, in hindsight it was more of a fleeting desire in all this excitement. practically, not the best idea. good call all of you

[Mr. Blonde]

Was talking to Sittinondubs on AIM and thought I should move this here:

Blonde: its amazing how few overweight, let alone obese people are here in korea. The only people SLIGHTLY overweight are middle aged+, and i've only seen like 2 obese people since getting here and one was a westerner.

Dubs: Don't they walk/bike a lot over there. Also, whenever I generally think of an eastern diet, I think lots of seafood, and lots of rice. Is this generally the case?


Well, some observations i've had since moving here that are kinda of the fault of good ole' american ethnocentrism and just in general taking things for granted, is that this place is fucking SMALL. An entire country, the size of Indiana. (Ironically, it really is the same size and relatively the same shape and so Indiana is actually used as a geographical reference) There are just over 6 million people in Indiana and about 50 million here, if that gives you any sort of idea of the amount of space, or lack thereof they have. So lots of people have cars, but a LOT of people also walk, way more than back home, but theres also a shitload more people. Agh. Point i'm getting at:

Indiana: Any town thats not Indianapolis, or strictly the downtown area usually doesn't have more than a couple, if any at all buildings taller than 5 or 6 stories high.

South Korea: Unless its a fucking fishing village, there will ALWAYS be many many many ten floor+ buildings in almost any area of any town. You can't see it that well in that picture above because its night and my camera sucks, but those buildings in the background are all apartment buildings that say shit like "12a, 13a, 14a, 15b", shit like that. Haven't figured out the numbers but its pretty crazy...it is almost futuristic with just having the entire population housed in the same types of buildings in different quadrants and shit.

In regard to the seafood and rice, YES. As much as i'd like to blame all the seafood on living in a harbour town its definitely everywhere. Also ramen (obviously) is very prominent here. Some strange american things that are popular: chupa chup suckers, Spam. Spam is huge here, i've never even had it. Actually now that I think about it the latter might have something do with the Korean War. Wiki'ing that shit now.

Also some of you also may have seen my post in the sexbox about squid, and they love that shit. head and everything served (fish are often like this too) in dishes...not sure how the actual eating of it goes yet. I do enjoy squid and eel though so I'm sure i'll eventually come around as well once I get past the head thing. lots of strange fish items for sale in the various groceries too, as well as all sorts of strange vegetables and fungii i've never heard of or seen before. the mushrooms i've had out here are fucking delicious, though, and kimchi is pretty good too...although I don't like it cold at all.

Its amazing how different eastern culture really is compared to traveling in Europe or Australia, or other westernized countries. You obviously hear and see things on tv or movies or magazines or whatever, but it doesn't really sink in till you are here. You almost don't believe it. -- "I ACTUALLY have to take off my shoes to eat out pretty much anywhere? I have to sit on the floor? What the hell is this metal thing, give me a proper cup. What do you mean its rude to pour my own drink? Put my hand on my arm when passing money or something else to someone to show reverence, what the fuck?"

I recently also found out (while asking what the fuck a "love motel"--literal translation-- means, cause I live in between two of them) that most Koreans live with their parents (also found out its mandatory military for 2 years once you turn 18 for...which I would totally support in the States btw...and I'm pretty sure the same guy told me North Korea makes men do 10 years and women do 7 or something...every one...mandatory. insane.) until they are married, so when they are dating someone and they want to fuck each other, they rent a room and hang out in it for allotted time period and have sex or whatever. So yeah, kinda scattered, I know, just really tired. One little gem I happen to be quite fond of thus far is Soju:

Some of you may have had it but I never had heard of it before coming out here. Its basically dirt cheap rice/potato/whatever the fuck else they make it with liquor that doesn't taste completely horrible straight (its traditionally sipped from a shotglass thing as seen in pic) and isn't such a high proof that you HAVE to shoot it anyways. It mixes great with coke, surprisingly...drinking it as we speak. Probably the strangest/most awesome thing about it is that it comes in bottles the size and feel of regular beer bottles. AND you can order bottles at bars because of their size, so you can basically walk around with the equivalent of 3-4 bottles of beer in one hand all night. Its pretty awesome.

[Dent]

Whats the difference between Soju and Sake?
And you're for mandatory national service? LOL

[Mr. Blonde]

I happen to think America is fully of privileged, unfit, whiny pussy fuckups or roided douchebags who could all use a little bit of discipline and/or humility, and there really isn't much to give them that these days. I also happen to think 18 years old as a standard age for going to college is fucking retarded cause no one really knows what they're doing at that age, or arguably any time in their early twenties and most end up with a degree they wont' use or will but in a job tehy will hate. I know it won't happen, but I think a mandatory 2 year term for the USA would be great for turning us around from being a nation of fuckups.


EDIT: this isn't just america bashing now that i'm in south korea/adopting their shit cause i'm here. i've always thought a 2 year mandatory for men would be a good idea. we already have selective service, there really isn't that much of a difference, and two years isn't really a long time in the grand scheme of things.

[TwoBlackEyes]

Originally Posted by Mr. Blonde

EDIT: this isn't just america bashing now that i'm in south korea/adopting their shit cause i'm here. i've always thought a 2 year mandatory for men and women would be a good idea. we already have selective service, there really isn't that much of a difference, and two years isn't really a long time in the grand scheme of things.

What's good for the goose is good for the gander.

Women need as much help growing up and not being vapid as men do, if not more, since we're basically raised to think that we aren't complete without a man.

I don't like the idea of a draft at all, but I'd like to see some kind of mandatory public service requirement in high schools. Either work at a job part time or volunteer so you get a taste of the real world before you're part of it so you learn how important it is to get educated so you don't have to work menial labor for the rest of your life, or at least what kind of menial labor you'd like to make your career.

[Ugly Bastard]

Disagree with you though Blonde about 18 being too young to go to college. If anything, people should get out of school earlier in life. American kids basically have their hands held until the age of 22 (or older!) before ever having to take on any responsibilities of their own. It leaves them spoiled and irresponsible. Then they think they're entitled to retire at age 55. People basically work for less than half of their lives nowadays and think they deserve a super-cushy lifestyle in the non-working years. And we wonder why America is up to its debt in eyeballs and virtually without a hope of being the world's economic superpower in a matter of a decade or so.

College is wayyy overrated. I would advise anyone with half a pair between their legs to skip it and go make their bones in sales or something somewhere. Instead, what does everyone do? Not only go to college, but figure out a way to go to college V2.0 (ie: law school or some worthless grad program) to just further bury themselves in debt and waste some of their most productive years accomplishing tasks that add virtually no value to society.

[f3lix]

Originally Posted by Dent

Whats the difference between Soju and Sake?

Look it up yourself, you lazy fuck

[Mr. Blonde]

Alright, so I took a nap today and had a crazy dream about taking in a stray dog, (although in my dream someone ended up telling me that it was a skunk that only LOOKED like a dog...dont' ask) and was woken up to some other english teachers I met last weekend stopping by my place. Turns out they found a stray dog in the park and knew I had mentioned looking into it, and had nowhere else to take it. They were going to take it to the police station and turn it in as a stray/to the pound, but they wanted to see if I wanted her first. My feelings are mixed, you guys make good points, but Koreans also generally end up eating dog that aren't small/wanted (koreans usually only want dogs that are small enough to fit in a purse), and this dog looks like she's going to be pretty big:













so....whether i like it or not, i guess i have a dog now.

[Orgazmo]

The dog getting ground up after you get rid of him doesn't make keeping him any more of a good idea. You should ditch him before you get attached.

Not to mention that, even though he's a dog, he's still Korean.

I wouldn't trust him.

[Mr. Blonde]

Originally Posted by Orgazmo

The dog getting ground up after you get rid of him doesn't make keeping him any more of a good idea.

think of rolf.

[Ugly Bastard]

Cute little son of a bitch, but I mean... think about this Blonde. WTF are you doing? What are you going to do when it's time to leave SK? Keep a good head on your shoulders here: you can't have a dog. That's all there is to it. I know your heart is in the right place, but your head isn't. You've got the rest of your life to adopt stray dogs. Now just isn't the time.