What kind of Drunk are YOU? - Nubblies.net Forums

Tig 'ol Bitties · 11-07-2003, 04:43 AM

Everyone I know has a different personality lurking somewhere in the depths of their souls that is often the antithesis of the person they purport to be during normal interaction with other members of the same species. This particular personality is one that can only be awakened and brought to the surface by the peculiar effects of the consumption of varying levels of fine spirits.

I believe that these personalities can be defined in six distinct classifications:

The Lover

The Lover just wants to hug everybody. Get a few drinks in him, and he'll never fucking let go. Also known as the Rib Crusher.

The Fighter

This jackass gets liquored up and decides he wants to get rowdy. Anyone's a target, and yet the fucker thinks it's the funniest thing in the world. A normal night ends with police involvement.

The Philosopher

Alcohol becomes the answer to every unanswered question in the universe. You'll be spending hour after inebriated hour discussing the finer points of the origin of life on earth, why communism should work, and how if everyone just believed, then the world would be a better place.

The Slut

This one's pretty simple: drunk = horny = sex with just about anyone or sadly, anything.

The Pseudo-Sober

"Dude, I can drive better when I'm drunk than I can when I'm sober."

The Partier

It's suddenly 1969, and this drunk is ready to pah-TAY!!! The clothes come off, the dancing is furious, the sweat is profuse and the stench is repulsive, but DUDE, it's time to pah-TAY!!! WOO HOO!!! (Think Will Farrell in "Old School.")

Personally, I'm a philosopher. I'll talk to people for hours who can't hear a thing I'm saying over the live band that I've forgotten about. It's sad. I often wonder if I ever really say anything profound, because everything seems profound when I'm lit.

So, which drunk are you?

(I decided to give it a shot.)

[ November 07, 2003, 01:48 AM: Message edited by: Tig 'ol Bitties ]

Combat Chuck · 11-07-2003, 06:42 AM

This post = Not bad 'tall.

I've seen each and every one of these drunks. But you forgot such drunks as The Slumpers. I've seen many a drunk that just doesn't do anything but sit with their head between their legs and puke on their pants.

Titan · 11-07-2003, 02:25 PM

Yeah you didn't actually have a stupid/clumsy drunk category. People that just kind of lazy around and function slower than normal, without any additive emotional attachments. There are plenty of those. And I'd be one of 'em. Basically what I'm saying is, you need The Sloth. But that's beside the point, this was a good poll.

[ November 07, 2003, 11:34 AM: Message edited by: Titan ]

VOL · 11-07-2003, 09:56 PM

Not a bad post. I think I talk philosophy to everyone around me.

[ November 07, 2003, 06:57 PM: Message edited by: VOL ]

Ugly Bastard · 11-07-2003, 10:01 PM

I'm the one sitting on the couch bored off his ass, 'cause he doesn't drink. Which kind is that?

-Ugly Bastard

VOL · 11-07-2003, 10:06 PM

The taker advantager.

the_butcher · 11-08-2003, 12:15 AM

I personally am the Party one, but I don't get slobbernockered and go fucking stumble everywhere. I just sit around and slur words and make fun of everyone. Also, I basically just laugh for about 10 minutes at a time, unceasing. Yeh, it rocks.

ProfessorNumber · 11-08-2003, 01:34 AM

The Jackass - The person who is always in the wrong place at the wrong time, and always manages to say the wrong thing at the wrong time. Also hits on everyone's girlfriends and talks to people who don't want to be talked to.

Yep, that's me. Somehow or other, whenever I'm at a party I manage to piss off tons of people completely unintentionally.

Titan · 11-08-2003, 04:59 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by ProfessorNumber:
Somehow or other, whenever I'm at a party I manage to piss off tons of people completely unintentionally.

How uncharacteristic of you.

tonguegina · 11-08-2003, 06:33 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by VOL:
I think I talk philosophy to everyone around me.

Really? How's that work out for you?

VOL · 11-08-2003, 06:40 PM

It doesn't.

P.S. The VOLS defeated Miami today.

tonguegina · 11-08-2003, 06:42 PM

What the fuck does that have to do with being drunk?

VOL · 11-08-2003, 06:48 PM

Drunk people are the only fans of Tennesse Vols. Ever been down south?

Pliedes · 11-08-2003, 08:21 PM

Have you?

VOL · 11-09-2003, 02:58 AM

That wasn't the question Pliedes.

11-07-2003, 02:25 PM	#3 (permalink)
Titan Senior Member Join Date: Nov 2002 Posts: 3,698 Internets: 10	Yeah you didn't actually have a stupid/clumsy drunk category. People that just kind of lazy around and function slower than normal, without any additive emotional attachments. There are plenty of those. And I'd be one of 'em. Basically what I'm saying is, you need The Sloth. But that's beside the point, this was a good poll. [ November 07, 2003, 11:34 AM: Message edited by: Titan ]
	I do what the fuck I want.

11-07-2003, 09:56 PM	#4 (permalink)
VOL Senior Member Join Date: Aug 2003 Location: there Posts: 2,305 Internets: -205	Not a bad post. I think I talk philosophy to everyone around me. [ November 07, 2003, 06:57 PM: Message edited by: VOL ]
	~ductor ab grandis divinitus~ CDXXVII

11-07-2003, 10:06 PM	#6 (permalink)
VOL Senior Member Join Date: Aug 2003 Location: there Posts: 2,305 Internets: -205	The taker advantager.
	~ductor ab grandis divinitus~ CDXXVII

11-08-2003, 12:15 AM	#7 (permalink)
the_butcher Senior Member Join Date: Apr 2003 Location: ::: the recesses of my mind ::: Posts: 1,023 Internets: 10	I personally am the Party one, but I don't get slobbernockered and go fucking stumble everywhere. I just sit around and slur words and make fun of everyone. Also, I basically just laugh for about 10 minutes at a time, unceasing. Yeh, it rocks.
	\| bite the bullet and swallow lead \|

11-08-2003, 01:34 AM	#8 (permalink)
ProfessorNumber Senior Member Join Date: May 2003 Posts: 1,215 Internets: 3373	The Jackass - The person who is always in the wrong place at the wrong time, and always manages to say the wrong thing at the wrong time. Also hits on everyone's girlfriends and talks to people who don't want to be talked to. Yep, that's me. Somehow or other, whenever I'm at a party I manage to piss off tons of people completely unintentionally.
	Smoke a cigarette and lie some more -- These conversations kill.

11-07-2003, 04:43 AM	#1 (permalink)
Tig 'ol Bitties Member Join Date: Oct 2003 Location: Right Thurr Posts: 96 Internets: 10	Everyone I know has a different personality lurking somewhere in the depths of their souls that is often the antithesis of the person they purport to be during normal interaction with other members of the same species. This particular personality is one that can only be awakened and brought to the surface by the peculiar effects of the consumption of varying levels of fine spirits. I believe that these personalities can be defined in six distinct classifications: The Lover The Lover just wants to hug everybody. Get a few drinks in him, and he'll never fucking let go. Also known as the Rib Crusher. The Fighter This jackass gets liquored up and decides he wants to get rowdy. Anyone's a target, and yet the fucker thinks it's the funniest thing in the world. A normal night ends with police involvement. The Philosopher Alcohol becomes the answer to every unanswered question in the universe. You'll be spending hour after inebriated hour discussing the finer points of the origin of life on earth, why communism should work, and how if everyone just believed, then the world would be a better place. The Slut This one's pretty simple: drunk = horny = sex with just about anyone or sadly, anything. The Pseudo-Sober "Dude, I can drive better when I'm drunk than I can when I'm sober." The Partier It's suddenly 1969, and this drunk is ready to pah-TAY!!! The clothes come off, the dancing is furious, the sweat is profuse and the stench is repulsive, but DUDE, it's time to pah-TAY!!! WOO HOO!!! (Think Will Farrell in "Old School.") Personally, I'm a philosopher. I'll talk to people for hours who can't hear a thing I'm saying over the live band that I've forgotten about. It's sad. I often wonder if I ever really say anything profound, because everything seems profound when I'm lit. So, which drunk are you? (I decided to give it a shot.) [ November 07, 2003, 01:48 AM: Message edited by: Tig 'ol Bitties ]

11-07-2003, 06:42 AM	#2 (permalink)
Combat Chuck Senior Member Join Date: Oct 2002 Posts: 2,063 Internets: 10	This post = Not bad 'tall. I've seen each and every one of these drunks. But you forgot such drunks as The Slumpers. I've seen many a drunk that just doesn't do anything but sit with their head between their legs and puke on their pants.

11-07-2003, 10:01 PM	#5 (permalink)
Ugly Bastard Senior Member Join Date: Feb 2002 Location: U.S.A. Posts: 13,643 Internets: 247330	I'm the one sitting on the couch bored off his ass, 'cause he doesn't drink. Which kind is that? -Ugly Bastard

11-08-2003, 06:40 PM	#11 (permalink)
VOL Senior Member Join Date: Aug 2003 Location: there Posts: 2,305 Internets: -205	It doesn't. P.S. The VOLS defeated Miami today.
	~ductor ab grandis divinitus~ CDXXVII

11-08-2003, 06:42 PM	#12 (permalink)
tonguegina I like dirt. Join Date: Feb 2002 Location: Indianapolis Posts: 2,861 Internets: 2790	What the fuck does that have to do with being drunk?

11-08-2003, 06:48 PM	#13 (permalink)
VOL Senior Member Join Date: Aug 2003 Location: there Posts: 2,305 Internets: -205	Drunk people are the only fans of Tennesse Vols. Ever been down south?
	~ductor ab grandis divinitus~ CDXXVII

11-08-2003, 08:21 PM	#14 (permalink)
Pliedes Senior Member Join Date: Oct 2002 Location: Puget Sound Posts: 4,594 Internets: 1608	Have you?

11-09-2003, 02:58 AM	#15 (permalink)
VOL Senior Member Join Date: Aug 2003 Location: there Posts: 2,305 Internets: -205	That wasn't the question Pliedes.
	~ductor ab grandis divinitus~ CDXXVII

Thread Tools
Show Printable Version Email this Page
Display Modes
Linear Mode Switch to Hybrid Mode Switch to Threaded Mode