It's possible that your wishings for Rudy Ruettiger's death are a bit harsh, but I wish to extend the whole picture of what his piss poor excuse for a presentation actually was.
(Please realize that my summation of the situation may be a bit off...it's highly likely that my lack of interest has made me perceive the order of events in a faulty manner)
The near 2000 bodies are herded into the gymnasium like sheep by the screaming administrators who walk around like they are pimp shit just because they have walky-talkies. (I noted one of them talking to the other one when they were a literal 5 feet from one another...why the fuck, seriously). They yell and point, and we go nicely onto one side of the gym...as Mr. Ruettiger requested. So yes, now we have 2000 people sitting where a lot less then 2000 people should be sitting. We sit, we wait...
A teacher appears in the middle of the gym and begins to sing the National Anthem...like this is some sort of fucking basketball game. We stand, we respect, we sit.
The lights dim and "I am proud to be an American" begins to blair thoughout the speakers. Alright, I'm proud and all, but what in the Ass-Toad does this have to do with Rudy? Is he some sort of hero? No, he's a "football player." (Just a note, he's as much of a football player as I am a Wildebeast. He was in a real game for 2 plays)
Then it begins, the overweight man jogs lightly onto the stage and begins to talk about how we all can do whatever we want. Basically, it's the same shit that all of the "inspirational" fucks spout everytime that the school deems it necessary to force us to listen to their unrealistic attempt to actually earn the exorbitant amount of money that they are being payed. The only difference was that this one didn't draw a pimp chalk drawing, and he actually had arms and legs. (For those of you who don't follow, some of the better speakers of the past included "The Chalk Guy" and some guy w/no arms and legs...he was actually worth listening to.)
The first 5 - 10 minutes of his presentations was the viewing of the extended version of the trailer for "Rudy." The only difference between what I saw in that film clip and what I would have seen if I would have been watching E!'s "Coming Attractions" version of Rudy was that at the end, the word "Rudy" appeared as some type of red graphic...something that looked as if its origins could be traced to one of those computers that you used to see in 1994. He paced on top of the tables set up to for ma makeshift platform as the trailer made the first one-sixth of his money for him.
The movie ended, and he actually began to talk. The next 5 minutes or so was burned up by a round of applause for every fucking body and thing that he could think of. He applauded our country, our school, ourselves, him, his pet dog, his dirty asshair, pretty much anything that you could possibly come up with. After that, he complimented our "character." His intentions here could be bifold. Either he knew that his presentation wasn't worth of $6,000, so he thought he'd try to butter us up, or he thought that we all had movies like him and wanted us to think he had seen them all, either way, the praise was duly noted, and then the actually talking began.
At this point in time, we are probably about 15 minutes into the presentation, one-forth of the way completed and he has not even inspired my cock to itch. He begins with a story of a "guy he knows." His barber or doctor...some shit like that, it was a made up story that he uses, that much is clear. I don't want to insult you by actually recounting his words, I will simply tell you that the story was at least 10 minutes long, taking us to the 25 minute mark. Let's have a quick recap...
*He has played a song for us
*Let us watch the trailer to his movie
*Let us applaud whatever he decided to pull from his ass
*Complimented us and
*Told us the inspirational story of some ficticious man
At this point, he's "earned" $3,000. Now he decides to divulge some bits of his personal life. He lives in Vegas, has a perfect daughter, a beautiful wife, doesn't have to do any real work, and have a little machine implanted into the back of his leg that gives him an orgasm whenever he says "Machine: Orgasm." Basically, he said "I have a great life, I have this, I have that, I have anything you could possibly want, I've met Clinton and you haven't, I have a movie made out of me, fuck you all...oh, you can have good stuff too I guess if you do what you want." His steel commitment and unwillingness to quit has also led him to his 2nd marriage...I don't think I mentioned that. But she's beautiful...so I guess it's alright...?
This little oral autobiography led to an in depth analysis of his daughter. I learned a ton...did you know, for instance, kids are great? I sure as fuck didn't. Did you know it's a good feeling to watch your kid's face light up when she sees Barney? I didn't before, and now I'm glad that I do. Oh, wait wait wait. No, I'm sorry, I was mistaken, I didn't mean to type "I didn't before, and now I'm glad that I do," I actually meant to say "Why in the fuck does this matter to me at this time in my life; why in the fuck is he getting payed to tell me about his precious daughter?" This little tangent led into a song. Can you imagine what the man who was earning six-times a normal man's weekly wages in one hour sang for us? None other than the Barney hit, "I love you, you love me...". He should have sang:
"Look at me...bullshit you...talking about my own life and getting paid too..."
What a fucker. The program concluded by watching the last 5 minutes of "Rudy" to the sound of some bitch singing about inspiration. Rudy came back and gave a short good-bye, and then he was gone...$6,000 richer.
He is a manipulative son of a bitch. He uses the fact that a reasonably good movie was made about his shitty life to make a living as a speaker. He also sells
shit on his website at a huge mark up. For instance, you can buy the Rudy DVD for $35.00! Wow, what a steal! Basically, this speaking left me with an impression of Rudy that he once was worth something, but as soon as he made his single tackle, his life went down the drain and a public speaker is what remains. His problem is partly due to the fact that his dream was to play one game for Notre Dame...he got his dream but now it's worth absolutely nothing. The small fact that he had a movie made about him keeps the fist of normal life from crushing his "5 foot nothin'...100 (actually, more like 250) and nothin' body."
In closing...was I inspired in the least bit? Fuck no. I have, though, lost a considerable amount of respect for this man. Thank you for your time.