Well folks, its been about a week since the last edition of the Boonville news, I decided to do this forum cast only once a week otherwise the daily news would become slightly repetitive.
In the last week Boonville has become a party town. With all the local college kids coming home for the summer and Clause "Tiny" Bronson being released from jail, last weekend was a big event. Let me give you the run down on Tiny, he was sent to adult prison at the age of 12 for shooting his father in the abdomin over a card game. He was released at 15 and went back just 3 months later after mutilating a peer's knee caps with a sheetrock saw for looking at his "girl". The girl's name is Wendy, at the time she was 10 and Tiny was and still is very much in love with her. If you haven't noticed Tiny is a little over protective of her, especially considering she doesn't want to be with him and never has. Poor Wendy gets ignored by everyone in town because of the fear Tiny instills in the locals.
Anyway last weekend Tiny's father threw a coming home party for him. It was great, beer, bitches, music, then Tiny showed up. Still in his orange jump suit Tiny kicks the radio across the porch, punches his father in the face and sits next to the keg. He starts guzzling the beer straight from the tap then stands up and screams where's Wendy. Well, Wendy is now 21 and has a boyfriend from college who is visiting for the weekend (He's 6'6" 275 and a prospective soon to be professional football player/meathead). Wendy say to the boyfriend I have to go talk to him, but the boyfriend insists she doesn't and says I will go talk to him. Wendy pleads to him, "please no, he's insane. Dont say anythng please". So what does the dick bag do, he aproaches Tiny.
Drunk and stumbling, the boyfriend walks towards Tiny ignoring the many of people there telling him not to do it. "TIINNYYY, YO TINY", he says in a drunken slur, Tiny turns to him and says "WHAT". "Yo, your gonna leave Wendy alone for good or else im gonna break you bro". Tiny looks at him slightly confused and say's "Wendy, you know Wendy?". The boyfriend responds, fuck yea I know her, she's my girl". I could feel the tension build up, people started backing away from Tiny and the boyfriend, it was dead silent and Tiny stands up looks at the guy and before the guy had a chance to square up Tiny jumps on him and bites his lips right off of his face. The boyfriend then falls to the ground screaming in agony while Tiny stands over him with blood running down his chin and begins to chews his lips like a dog knawling on a slab of jearky. "You will never kiss anyone's girl again", Tiny says. He then turn to the crowd and says "What the fuck is everyone staring at, this is my party now fucking enjoy it". Everyone immediately went back to what they were doing before the incident and Tiny picked up the boyfriend and walked towards the lake.
Well Fuck Nuts, thats it for now. Fuck off!
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