Just About Burnt Down My House

[Ugly Bastard]

At 10:10 I put on 6 hard boiled eggs. You're to boil them for like 25 minutes, then put cold water on them. So at 10:35 I was supposed to take them out. Just a few minutes ago, about 11:50 it hit me like a ton of bricks that I never touched them. I overcooked them by 1:15.

I sprint out of my room, round the corner to look in the kitchen, I see NOTHING but complete smoke everywhere. I'm scared shit less at this point. The whole house WREAKS badly. I get to the stove, and the eggs are sitting on the bottom of the pan just fucking getting the shit burnt out of them. All the water evaporated by this time, and it's just the eggs sitting there burning like fuck. And it stinks so bad. All of them had exploded at one point or another. I found pieces of egg shell on the dining room coffee table (like 25 feet away), that's a big big big god damn explosion. I don't know how I didn't hear or smell this before simply remembering.

Anyway, I need advice: My house fucking wreaks right now of burnt egg. People, let me tell you, this is the single worst smell ever to grace my nose in the 20 years I've spent on this Earth. What I'm wondering is, do you think it's going to smell like this forever, or will eventually all the fans I'm running blow the smell out? Like basically I'm worried that my clothes and shit are going to be stained with this awful awful smell. Help. Ty.

-Ugly Bastard

[ April 18, 2005, 12:43 AM: Message edited by: Ugly Bastard ]

[Repugnant Abomination]

Rotten egg, possibly the worst smell ever. I dont know man you're pretty fucked. I dont think it will last forever, but I wouldn't be bringing any hot women over for a few weeks.

[Mr. Blonde]

burnt egg*. and I wouldn't worry about that last part

[Repugnant Abomination]

Oooooooooooooouch!

[the Butcher]

smoking a bunch of cigarettes in your house with the windows up would definitely cover the smell of rotten egg. however, your house would smell like smoke. this can be easily treated with just opening the windows again and lighting a shitton of candles. i'd rather go through that process then smell burned, rotten eggs. fucking sick man.

[God's Substitute]

for the moment don't invite people to your house. meanwhile buy an air freshner

[fancymeghan]

i'd open the windows....turn on every fan...and get a shit ton of air freshener...or candles....or something toxically strong that will overpower the nasty smell.

[MAGICLIT]

candles, fan, and a crossbreeze......however to avoid the smell all together.......don't attempt to cook again

[ProfessorNumber]

Honestly, I would make about 7 bags of microwave popcorn and the place them strategically throughout the house. Cook them for an extra 30 seconds after they are ready and they won't smell burnt, but they will smell stronger than usual. Then you could light candles, as everyone else mentioned.

[ninjaface]

OUST. I had never experienced the joy of oust until about 2 months ago. Go to Sam's Club. Buy a 3 pack of OUST, then Spray the all of the rooms that had smoke in them. And by spray the rooms, I mean spray everything. The walls, ceilings, and the furniture.

[Ugly Bastard]

Originally posted by ninjaface:
Go to Sam's Club.

If I wanted an employee pushing a sale on me, I would have asked for it!

Welcome back.

-Ugly Bastard

[StabMaster Arson]

Originally posted by ProfessorNumber:
Honestly, I would make about 7 bags of microwave popcorn and the place them strategically throughout the house. Cook them for an extra 30 seconds after they are ready and they won't smell burnt, but they will smell stronger than usual. Then you could light candles, as everyone else mentioned.

He's the Martha Stewart of the NeoNazis