That's right folks, you read the header right. This here is the first official review of the opposing side in the never-ending conflict between the bad-asses.
Just this past Tuesday, a little film called
Pirates Of The Carribean was released on DVD, much to the overjoyment of many a man on this board, and hormone driven girls all over the country. I admit, it was a good flick. I thought that as a movie, it was a great candidate for someone looking for something adventurous, light-hearted, and mildly homoerotic. (All in jest.
)
I found it quite humorous that the timing for this release coincided pretty closely to the release of the film that I saw last night,
The Last Samurai. But that actually worked to this reviewer's advantage, seeing as how I could brush up on my recollection of
Pirates so that I could fairly judge its weaknesses when compared to
Samurai.
However, this wasn't as easy of a task as one might think. Seeing as both films couldn't be farther apart in mood, atmosphere, or direction, comparing the two movies became a moot point halfway throught the film, if not even earlier.
The Last Samurai is a story based upon General James Awngren (I do believe I have it all spelled correctly) and his journey to Japan to enlist his services to the Emperor against a rebellion by a tribe of Samurai.
As Awngren, Cruise seems
just a little too pretty. But his performance is top-notch, no matter the outside appearance. From alcoholic to hardened warrior, it's a wonder that Cruise can so deftly portray myriad emotions with that similar expressions on his face. You know, the one where it looks like his mouth is a bit limp and his eyebrows are intently curved in, giving him that look of boring concentration? Yeah, that one. The one that's been getting him lead roles since the 80's. Nevertheless, early on in the movie, one tends to forget that we're watching a mega-movie box office slaughterer, and instead spying on the tormented figure of a man who has lived a life of strict orders and unneeded slaughter. The parallels of the Indian eradication in the American West and Vietnam and the effects they have on the men involved was pretty clear, and I liked how they took this feel and applied it apart from a war other than Vietnam.
However, while this movie was a Cruise showboat, much in the same vein as Pirates was a Depp showboat, the supporting characters were just as strong in Samurai as was the case with Pirates.
Foremost in mind is the performance of Katsimoto, the leader of the Samurai clan. His manner just exuded honor and loyalty and it was no wonder that the men and women of his village followed him with such conviction, as well as how easy it was for Cruise to adapt the Samurai ways under the training of this man. He probably had the best performance of the movie, in my honest and always right opinion.
Now let's do a comparitive study.
Women?
Pirates = Kiera Knightley. She's hot, but....sometimes the acting left much to be desired. But in Pirates, that was excusable seeing as how it wasn't supposed to incite serious performances. But still, it doesn't mean that
Samurai = There is basically only one woman in the film, but hot damn, she's probably one of the most beautiful Asian women I have ever laid eyes upon. Hoo. Ah. Her performance was perfect as well, giving her the full advantage.
Bad-assness?
Pirates = Wow. An undead crew? Sword-fighting out the wazoo? Stealing, pillaging, implied raping, grotesque imagery, accompanied with impressive visuals and soaring shots?
Pirates really gave you the adventure that was needed to truly feel as a Pirate feels. However, you've got that betrayal, and greed, and basically ending up being hung from a rock formation at the entrance to ports. I've actually done alot of reading here of late about legends and curses pertaining to Pirates, and it's fascinating stuff. But most legendary pirates, man and woman, ended up getting caught and ceremoniously offed by either getting their necks broken on the gallows or tortured in cages hung on docks. Not much honor in that death.
Samurai = Honor. Tradition. A fighting technique that has been passed on from generation to generation, proving that it's more effective than anything around. Bad-assness? Watch the scene where the samurai's aren't even visible on screen, but the imperial army is still quaking in it's shoes,
along with the audience. And I know, I know, samurai's aren't our affiliations here on Nubblies. So I'll talk about the ninjas. Who helped create one of the best scenes of the movies. Hot damn, they were bad-ass.
Samurai wins again.
Oh, and you want to see honorable deaths?
Watch this fucking movie. Pirates hold no candles.
But in overall movie magic, Pirates had a better/fun script, and a more original idea, even if it was inspired by a Disney ride. Samurai has the formula of many war movies, but that's its only detriment. And it's a slight detriment. Cause war movies fucking rock.
All in all, go see
The Last Samurai because it's completely worth your hard-earned/not-earned-at-all-but-from-your-parents money. It won't change affiliations, but it sure will change opinions. I guarantee you that you will come out of this movie feeling like you should bow to the director (Zwick) for allowing you the honor of watching this incredibly cinematic beaut.
Enjoy folks. Enjoy.
[ December 06, 2003, 11:02 PM: Message edited by: Combat Chuck ]