here's a new quiz.

http://www.philosophers.co.uk/games/god.htm

Can't you see the fundamental flaw to the line of thought that is presented through that quiz?

That quiz was stupid.

explain the stupidity

[ July 19, 2003, 10:47 PM: Message edited by: BrassMonkees ]

I'll let it explain its stupidity itself...

This assumes that whenever we seek answers, we will definitely find answers...which simply isn't the case. I haven't bitten the bullet, my dear quiz, you have bitten the bullet.

Again, Mr. Quiz, you're a dumbass. You assume that, because I think it's plausible that a man can justify rape to himself via religion, I too justify the action. Simply because I can understand that a man would act in such a manner does not mean that I see the action fit.

This is wrong on two separate levels. Firstly, the question's first words were If God exists. The answer goes on to explain the circumstances assuming that I believe that God exists, whereas the question took into account either situation. A bifold question can't be addressed with a singular answer. Going further, it doesn't disprove the target which it attempts. To say that, simply because God isn't constrained in our logic, we can't discuss God in any form is ludicrous. I don't understand all of calculus...but if you want to talk about derivitives, I'm your Huckleberry. Simply because something isn't wholly understood doesn't mean that it's completely bogus...

In the end, my views were entirely consistent...but the computer thought they were unpalatable at times...

Um, did I just see in the first quote box, the use of the word 'she' describing God?

Yeah, I found that odd when I took the quiz, but it could just be a "Dogma" Reference.

No, it was just the apparent tendency of self-proclaimed intellectuals to be cynical assholes. That test was intended to lead the common believer down a predrawn path with quasirational logic and "Jedi Mind Tricks". They should be shot in the face. It's no wonder why the studies they laud so much have become so esoteric. Bastards.

Alright... not like I'm much better.

i took quiz...of coursee im not really sure what it just said..because i took it like 5min ago

but im pretty sure its a piece of shit because a stop sign popped up--said i was thinking a certain way, when i clearly wasn't..

also

pirates like to have sex with other men

I just read this from Albino Black Sheep, and thought of this thread whilst doing so. Kinda long...but interesting, nonetheless.

This morning there was a knock at my door. When I answered the door I found a well groomed, nicely dressed couple. The man spoke first:

John:
"Hi! I'm John, and this is Mary."

Mary:
"Hi! We're here to invite you to come kiss Hank's ass with us."

Me:
"Pardon me?! What are you talking about? Who's Hank, and why would I want to kiss His ass?"

John:
"If you kiss Hank's ass, He'll give you a million dollars; and if you don't, He'll kick the shit out of you."

Me:
"What? Is this some sort of bizarre mob shake-down?"

John:
"Hank is a billionaire philanthropist. Hank built this town. Hank owns this town. He can do whatever He wants, and what He wants is to give you a million dollars, but He can't until you kiss His ass."

Me:
"That doesn't make any sense. Why..."

Mary:
"Who are you to question Hank's gift? Don't you want a million dollars? Isn't it worth a little kiss on the ass?"

Me:
"Well maybe, if it's legit, but..."

John:
"Then come kiss Hank's ass with us."

Me:
"Do you kiss Hank's ass often?"

Mary:
"Oh yes, all the time..."

Me:
"And has He given you a million dollars?"

John:
"Well no. You don't actually get the money until you leave town."

Me:
"So why don't you just leave town now?"

Mary:
"You can't leave until Hank tells you to, or you don't get the money, and He kicks the shit out of you."

Me:
"Do you know anyone who kissed Hank's ass, left town, and got the million dollars?"

John:
"My mother kissed Hank's ass for years. She left town last year, and I'm sure she got the money."

Me:
"Haven't you talked to her since then?"

John:
"Of course not, Hank doesn't allow it."

Me:
"So what makes you think He'll actually give you the money if you've never talked to anyone who got the money?"

Mary:
"Well, He gives you a little bit before you leave. Maybe you'll get a raise, maybe you'll win a small lotto, maybe you'll just find a twenty-dollar bill on the street."

Me:
"What's that got to do with Hank?"

John:
"Hank has certain 'connections.'"

Me:
"I'm sorry, but this sounds like some sort of bizarre con game."

John:
"But it's a million dollars, can you really take the chance? And remember, if you don't kiss Hank's ass He'll kick the shit of you."

Me:
"Maybe if I could see Hank, talk to Him, get the details straight from Him..."

Mary:
"No one sees Hank, no one talks to Hank."

Me:
"Then how do you kiss His ass?"

John:
"Sometimes we just blow Him a kiss, and think of His ass. Other times we kiss Karl's ass, and he passes it on."

Me:
"Who's Karl?"

Mary:
"A friend of ours. He's the one who taught us all about kissing Hank's ass. All we had to do was take him out to dinner a few times."

Me:
"And you just took his word for it when he said there was a Hank, that Hank wanted you to kiss His ass, and that Hank would reward you?"

John:
"Oh no! Karl has a letter he got from Hank years ago explaining the whole thing. Here's a copy; see for yourself."

** From the desk of Karl **

Kiss Hank's ass and He'll give you a million dollars when you leave town.
Use alcohol in moderation.
Kick the shit out of people who aren't like you.
Eat right.
Hank dictated this list Himself.
The moon is made of green cheese.
Everything Hank says is right.
Wash your hands after going to the bathroom.
Don't use alcohol.
Eat your wieners on buns, no condiments.
Kiss Hank's ass or He'll kick the shit out of you.

Me:
"This appears to be written on Karl's letterhead."

Mary:
"Hank didn't have any paper."

Me:
"I have a hunch that if we checked we'd find this is Karl's handwriting."

John:
"Of course, Hank dictated it."

Me:
"I thought you said no one gets to see Hank?"

Mary:
"Not now, but years ago He would talk to some people."

Me:
"I thought you said He was a philanthropist. What sort of philanthropist kicks the shit out of people just because they're different?"

Mary:
"It's what Hank wants, and Hank's always right."

Me:
"How do you figure that?"

Mary:
"Item 7 says 'Everything Hank says is right.' That's good enough for me!"

Me:
"Maybe your friend Karl just made the whole thing up."

John:
"No way! Item 5 says 'Hank dictated this list himself.' Besides, item 2 says 'Use alcohol in moderation,' Item 4 says 'Eat right,' and item 8 says 'Wash your hands after going to the bathroom.' Everyone knows those things are right, so the rest must be true, too."

Me:
"But 9 says 'Don't use alcohol.' which doesn't quite go with item 2, and 6 says 'The moon is made of green cheese,' which is just plain wrong."

John:
"There's no contradiction between 9 and 2, 9 just clarifies 2. As far as 6 goes, you've never been to the moon, so you can't say for sure."

Me:
"Scientists have pretty firmly established that the moon is made of rock..."

Mary:
"But they don't know if the rock came from the Earth, or from out of space, so it could just as easily be green cheese."

Me:
"I'm not really an expert, but I think the theory that the Moon was somehow 'captured' by the Earth has been discounted*. Besides, not knowing where the rock came from doesn't make it cheese."

John:
"Ha! You just admitted that scientists make mistakes, but we know Hank is always right!"

Me:
"We do?"

Mary:
"Of course we do, Item 7 says so."

Me:
"You're saying Hank's always right because the list says so, the list is right because Hank dictated it, and we know that Hank dictated it because the list says so. That's circular logic, no different than saying 'Hank's right because He says He's right.'"

John:
"Now you're getting it! It's so rewarding to see someone come around to Hank's way of thinking."

Me:
"But...oh, never mind. What's the deal with wieners?"

Mary:
She blushes.

John:
"Wieners, in buns, no condiments. It's Hank's way. Anything else is wrong."

Me:
"What if I don't have a bun?"

John:
"No bun, no wiener. A wiener without a bun is wrong."

Me:
"No relish? No Mustard?"

Mary:
She looks positively stricken.

John:
He's shouting. "There's no need for such language! Condiments of any kind are wrong!"

Me:
"So a big pile of sauerkraut with some wieners chopped up in it would be out of the question?"

Mary:
Sticks her fingers in her ears. "I am not listening to this. La la la, la la, la la la."

John:
"That's disgusting. Only some sort of evil deviant would eat that..."

Me:
"It's good! I eat it all the time."

Mary:
She faints.

John:
He catches Mary. "Well, if I'd known you were one of those I wouldn't have wasted my time. When Hank kicks the shit out of you I'll be there, counting my money and laughing. I'll kiss Hank's ass for you, you bunless cut-wienered kraut-eater."

With this, John dragged Mary to their waiting car, and sped off.

The important thing to remember is that God is God and he is God for a reason. Why should hypocritical,irresponsible, sinful human beings that we are try and discuss what plan the almighty has made for us. The point is that "if" (which i strongly believe) God created this world, he made it this way for a reason. You can say that the bible isnt accurate,(what has been disproven?) but I strongly believe in what it says and writing your own "good people go to heaven" religions isnt helping anyone (including yourself) Heaven...place of perfection. how Cheap would heaven be if your sitting there and Adolf Hitler was your roomate? (We dont know he might have accepted christ at the last second) Heaven is defined as a place where you worship God The almighty omnipresent force in the universe. That is for eternity. If you dont worship God why should you be there? Would you want to be there? Spending your whole life disowning and trying to argue he doesnt exist? After experiencing every day the miracle this world is and then still you stick to your own sin? That would not be heaven. To relish in your own stupidity and lack of "Duh" or commen sense. To know you spent the life he gave you and the choice, full knowing of all the facts, and you still acted bull headed, even after Jesus died on the cross for everyone...still you act stupidly? what more could he do?
I also think that the dude who only trusts his pastor is in deep crap. It is ok to trust and honor pastors, but the bible is there for a reason everyone must read and develope their own beliefs, why put your eternity in the handsof another imperfect human being? Pastors are meant to help you grow as a christian not decide for you.
Well I will wait for someone to ridicule me because the reason why we argue is to strengthen our own beliefs, not necesarily to spread them.
MaRkEtSTBIZATCH

Wow 'Gaz, that was a fucking hilarious and beautifully witty piece of literature. Thank you so much for that, that's going in my personal files.

*Wipes tear from eye*

Oh by the way, people who double-post get the shit kicked out of them by Hank.

[ July 24, 2003, 07:21 PM: Message edited by: Titan ]

word.

Uh-oh, I think I just got smarter while I was on the internet. That can't be right. Nice posts, everyone, this is probably the most interesting stuff I have ever read on Nubblies.

Correct me if I'm wrong, but atheists don't beleve in any higher diety, do they? In order for there to be a heaven or hell, wouldn't that require some sort of higher diety to judge you? Everyone thinks differently about others, there'd have to be a median, you know?
Just a thought...

I just thought of this the other day. What if God created the bible to be flawed so humans would have to decide and learn for themselves what is right or wrong and what they need to do to get into Heaven.

Constance, In responce to your post, I myself am an agnostic. Therefore, part of the time I believe that God/Heaven/Hell are real, and because I think they are real, I believe that athiests can get into heaven. What I am implying, is that even though atheists COULD be wrong in their beliefs, they can still get into Heaven.

Replace "get into Heaven" with "fulfill their purpose" and you've got a nice little statement there Loser.

http://www.nubblies.net/ubb/uploads/1062874791.jpg

[ September 06, 2003, 02:00 PM: Message edited by: Titan ]

Oooh, very nice Titan.

Is there some hidden message inside that picture? Like...white letters spelled backwards means something? Or any shit like that? Because I'm looking at it and it feels like there should be...

You can't be both there, ProfessorNumber. If you are pretty firm in your beliefs that there is in fact a god, then you really aren't agnostic.

Butch-
No, there isn't.
That was an option, of course, but I chose not to take that path. I knew people would then spend all their time trying to dispell the hidden message and miss the whole point of the piece... not that that won't happen anyway.
And if I were to do that... it would be the black letters... because they don't stand out.

[ September 06, 2003, 03:51 PM: Message edited by: Titan ]

Ok, so I've heard what you think about atheists. Can people of other religions like Hindus or Buddhists go to Heaven?

My Hindu friends plan on going to Hindu Heaven and the Buddhists to Buddhist Heaven (i.e. enlightenment, reincarnation, yadda yadda blah).