Believe me, in any other circumstance I would have beat the shit out of the ring leader. What I did, my prayer, my holding her and telling her she was forgiven, I did that all out of love, because I knew how much it meant to her. That doesn't mean it didn't piss me off knowing I was manipulated into the situation, and it doesn't stop me from thinking they're all, including my mom, idiots. Honestly, me causing a scene would have only added to the spectacle of an already melodramatic situation.
No, I never did accept Jesus, I just stared straight ahead with steely resolve - it was the one thing I just couldn't do - I felt like I had compromised enough. But yeah, it was some serious full blown cult shit, and it saddens me to no end knowing they are already recruiting my brother and turning him against me (he's only 16). I'm cast as the antagonist in my own house, and I guess I always will be.
And yeah, as soon as my mom dies I'm getting the hell out of there. I don't care if I'm ostracized and cut from the will or what ever else they can threaten, I'm done. I may lose everything else, but at least I'll have my self respect.
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