Today, I had a bit of a rude awakening. One of my consciensious neghbors decided to call the cops on me this morning. I was awoken by a sharp "tap tap" on my window. Howly fuck its the cops, as I stumbled from the car. Every once and a blue moon I decide its a good idea to sleep in my car if the music is good. Last night was one such occasion.
As I stepped out of the vehicle I noticed two cruisers sitting behind my car. I believe, "holy shit", was the words that came to mind. The cop said to me have you been drinking last night? I immediately went into shut the fuck up mode. The cop tried to play social games with me, sucggesting perhaps I couldn't understand him. "do you understand the words coming out of my mouth, boy?" I continued with my vow of silence. the officer asked for my registration, As i flipped out the console untold numbers of unpaid parking tickets spilled out. I tried to exuce myself from the offficer, "excuse me while I whip this out." (luckily I had viewed the great movie blazing saddles a couple days before. I gave him my registration and he seemed satified.
He the aquired if I lived there. I confirmed this fact by leading him and his partner up to my appartment. I unlocked the door and went inside, saying "come on in gentlemen" as I turned around Mr. cop was already on his way out, he said something to the effect of some kind of important saying like a parable about getting into a car while drunk or some shit, I don't exactly remember.
When they finally left I let out a "woot." I had won the day.
Moral of the story: "shut the fuck up"
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