The forbidden cock slap - Nubblies.net Forums

Repugnant Abomination · 05-28-2005, 12:51 AM

There should be nothing forbidden about it. If you're looking for a perfect way to degrade and smite your enemies then the cock slap is just for you! For those of you who don't know what the cock slap is allow me to explain:

Obviously you slap the person across the face with your cock. But there are subtleties and artistic decisions that must be made along this way when practicing this ancient art. First of all your cock must be flaccid. You can't have a raging hard on because you wont beable to get the required whipping effect. It can't be totally limp either though, because you wont beable to induce a slap. It has to be somewhere inbetween the two extremes, leaning more towards limpness. It's always important to be careful during the slapping process to make sure your balls never get involved. This is not the ball slap, this is the cock slap. Besides slapping your balls hurts. The next thing to concern yourself with is the actual slap itself. Some prefer to slap the person across the face using their hand as the main souce of force, holding the cock and doing a smacking like motion. I on the other hand prefer to go hands free. You can accomplish this by using your hips. It's important to twist back and then twist forward fast enough to the cock lashes forward at tremendous speeds, possibly breaking the sound barrier. Some argue where the slap should land, but it's generally agreed that the cheek is the best target.

You know you have a succesful cock slap when you hear a resounding flash against flash smacking sound. The reciever should grimace in pain, his eyes should water and he should immediately look down in shame, for he has just been cock slapped.

If you want to put your own personal style into it that is always encouraged. I for one will often dip my shlong into different foods or liquids, leaving an extra mark on the enemies face and degrading him that much more. I find sticky liquids work best, like honey or oil.

Any questions?

f3lix · 05-28-2005, 03:54 PM

Where do you come up with these posts?

St. Anky · 05-28-2005, 10:14 PM

i've cock slapped my girlfriend before. a couple times actually.

Deadly Crescent Kick · 05-30-2005, 01:43 PM

great essay on the CS.

but i must respectfully disagree w/ you asessment of flacidness versus rigidity.

i prefer to CS while more rigid as opposed to more flacid. while i appreciate your "flexible weapon" analogy, i would have to argue that a more rigid penis or even a fully erect penis (the exception, not the rule) does more damage as a bludgeoning weapon.

Repugnant Abomination · 05-30-2005, 08:41 PM

Well certainly a more rigid approach will act as a more blunt weapon to strike with. Rather then a resounding slap you would get sort of a dull sounding thud. I guess it's just a personal preference.

Ironic Mustache · 05-31-2005, 12:21 PM

Dude did I talk to you about this while I was drunk this weekend? The coincidence here is amazing.

I cock slapped my woman on the leg while she was on the phone with her mom.

"Did you just dick whip me????"

"I'm not sure, let me check with the judges. Judges? Is 'dick whip' acceptable? Yes? Well then you win several more dick whips as a prize."

*Whippah!

Cock slaps to the face are where it gets tricky though. I threatened her with one and she gave me that, "if you even think about it, I'll murder you" look.

As for technique, I'm definitely a flacid cock slapper. There's nothing more pleasant to the ears than a good flacid cock slap. A fully erect Ironic Mustache might knock a bitch clean out. I can't be responsible for that.

MAGICLIT · 05-31-2005, 06:26 PM

yea, my b/f does that randomly, i retaliate by sitting on his face naked but he seems to like that...........

THEINCREDIBLEdork · 06-01-2005, 12:51 AM

Thanks repug! All my the questions I've long given up on have been answered. I've tried casually bring it up with my parents, but it always proved too taboo. And it shouldn't be. What a rewarding day!

Quote:

Originally posted by St. Anky:
i've cock slapped my girlfriend before. a couple times actually.

yea you probably cockslapped her butthole you buttfucker

[ May 31, 2005, 10:53 PM: Message edited by: THEINCREDIBLEdork ]

06-01-2005, 03:16 AM

How would you try to bring such a conversation up?

I mean do you just say "Dad, what techniques do you use when cockslapping mom?" Or do you have to be more subtle.

[ June 01, 2005, 01:18 AM: Message edited by: DJ FC ]

ninjaface · 06-01-2005, 11:59 AM

Are bonus points awarded for bruising?

Ironic Mustache · 06-01-2005, 12:17 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Deadly Crescent Kick:
[QB]i prefer to CS while more rigid as opposed to more flacid.QB]

You're going to put someone's eye out!

bloodyfart · 06-01-2005, 01:04 PM

"his eyes should water and he should immediately look down in shame"

why are you cockslapping another man?

Ironic Mustache · 06-01-2005, 01:38 PM

That struck me as a little odd too. You'll notice that everyone else references cock slapping a woman (except DCK, but he's exempt from all gay jokes because of his two chicks (except the spooning funglool jokes)).

bloodyfart · 06-01-2005, 01:39 PM

im gay so i pick up on those things.

MAGICLIT · 06-01-2005, 01:48 PM

Your father must be so proud.

Ironic Mustache · 06-01-2005, 02:00 PM

His father is the reason he's gay.

MAGICLIT · 06-01-2005, 02:00 PM

Oh, like Francis?

St. Anky · 06-01-2005, 02:18 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by St. Anky:
i've cock slapped my girlfriend before. a couple times actually.

yea you probably cockslapped her butthole you buttfucker[/QB][/quote]

fuck you

bloodyfart · 06-01-2005, 03:02 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by MAGICLIT:
Oh, like Francis?

francis from peewees big adventure.

THEINCREDIBLEdork · 06-01-2005, 03:41 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by bloodyfart:
"his eyes should water and he should immediately look down in shame"

why are you cockslapping another man?

cockslapping is not a sexual act, therefore cockslapping a man is not a gay act. Its the ultimate shame for the one who is being slapped.

Quote:

Originally posted by DJ FC:
How would you try to bring such a conversation up?

I mean do you just say "Dad, what techniques do you use when cockslapping mom?" Or do you have to be more subtle.

subtlety is must, and when asking such a question you must try to make it so you slowly meet eachother halfway until youre both on the same page, without ever admitting what youre talking about. which is where i've failed. The closest i've gotten is to discussing the link between sausages and shame while grilling with my father, but I must have moved to fast because he quickly changed the subject.

Ironic Mustache · 06-01-2005, 05:03 PM

Taking a piss isn't a sexual act either but you wouldn't go holding another man's shlong for him. I wouldn't want my shlong on some dude's face, anymore than I'd want some dude's shlong anywhere near me.

bloodyfart · 06-01-2005, 06:08 PM

very true.

MAGICLIT · 06-01-2005, 06:20 PM

I personally like shlongs near me.

bloodyfart · 06-01-2005, 06:33 PM

we know

MAGICLIT · 06-01-2005, 06:40 PM

O, and i like vaginas.

05-30-2005, 01:43 PM	#4 (permalink)
Deadly Crescent Kick NJ, Toilet Bowl of USA Join Date: May 2005 Location: secret ninja lair Posts: 1,106 Internets: 10	great essay on the CS. but i must respectfully disagree w/ you asessment of flacidness versus rigidity. i prefer to CS while more rigid as opposed to more flacid. while i appreciate your "flexible weapon" analogy, i would have to argue that a more rigid penis or even a fully erect penis (the exception, not the rule) does more damage as a bludgeoning weapon.
	the poster formerly known as-Andy Kaufman NHB Intergender Champion jiu-jitsu isn't the hardass frat guy yelling at you to funnel a beer. its the laid back guy in the corner workin' on 2 chicks.

05-31-2005, 12:21 PM	#6 (permalink)
Ironic Mustache G'd up from the feet up. Join Date: Jan 2005 Location: Cali Posts: 7,146 Supreme Emperor of the Jiu Jitsu Shit Forum?: Yes Internets: 114735	Dude did I talk to you about this while I was drunk this weekend? The coincidence here is amazing. I cock slapped my woman on the leg while she was on the phone with her mom. "Did you just dick whip me????" "I'm not sure, let me check with the judges. Judges? Is 'dick whip' acceptable? Yes? Well then you win several more dick whips as a prize." *Whippah! Cock slaps to the face are where it gets tricky though. I threatened her with one and she gave me that, "if you even think about it, I'll murder you" look. As for technique, I'm definitely a flacid cock slapper. There's nothing more pleasant to the ears than a good flacid cock slap. A fully erect Ironic Mustache might knock a bitch clean out. I can't be responsible for that.
	Creeping around as I please nonchalantly like any other Supreme Emperor might.

05-31-2005, 06:26 PM	#7 (permalink)
MAGICLIT Senior Member Join Date: Feb 2005 Location: city of sin Posts: 2,753 Internets: 10	yea, my b/f does that randomly, i retaliate by sitting on his face naked but he seems to like that...........
	I am all in favor of a ruling class, especially since I rule.

06-01-2005, 03:16 AM	#9 (permalink)
DJ FC Guest Posts: n/a	How would you try to bring such a conversation up? I mean do you just say "Dad, what techniques do you use when cockslapping mom?" Or do you have to be more subtle. [ June 01, 2005, 01:18 AM: Message edited by: DJ FC ]
DJ FC Guest Posts: n/a

06-01-2005, 01:04 PM	#12 (permalink)
bloodyfart Senior Member Join Date: Apr 2005 Location: side control Posts: 2,044 Internets: 203	"his eyes should water and he should immediately look down in shame" why are you cockslapping another man?
	<b>We're here, and we're queer, so get used to it</b>

05-28-2005, 12:51 AM	#1 (permalink)
Repugnant Abomination Almost there... Join Date: Feb 2005 Posts: 5,979 Internets: 164547	There should be nothing forbidden about it. If you're looking for a perfect way to degrade and smite your enemies then the cock slap is just for you! For those of you who don't know what the cock slap is allow me to explain: Obviously you slap the person across the face with your cock. But there are subtleties and artistic decisions that must be made along this way when practicing this ancient art. First of all your cock must be flaccid. You can't have a raging hard on because you wont beable to get the required whipping effect. It can't be totally limp either though, because you wont beable to induce a slap. It has to be somewhere inbetween the two extremes, leaning more towards limpness. It's always important to be careful during the slapping process to make sure your balls never get involved. This is not the ball slap, this is the cock slap. Besides slapping your balls hurts. The next thing to concern yourself with is the actual slap itself. Some prefer to slap the person across the face using their hand as the main souce of force, holding the cock and doing a smacking like motion. I on the other hand prefer to go hands free. You can accomplish this by using your hips. It's important to twist back and then twist forward fast enough to the cock lashes forward at tremendous speeds, possibly breaking the sound barrier. Some argue where the slap should land, but it's generally agreed that the cheek is the best target. You know you have a succesful cock slap when you hear a resounding flash against flash smacking sound. The reciever should grimace in pain, his eyes should water and he should immediately look down in shame, for he has just been cock slapped. If you want to put your own personal style into it that is always encouraged. I for one will often dip my shlong into different foods or liquids, leaving an extra mark on the enemies face and degrading him that much more. I find sticky liquids work best, like honey or oil. Any questions?

05-28-2005, 03:54 PM	#2 (permalink)
f3lix Gangnam Style Join Date: Oct 2003 Location: DH's Massage Parlor Posts: 6,383 Internets: 213510	Where do you come up with these posts?

05-28-2005, 10:14 PM	#3 (permalink)
St. Anky Senior Member Join Date: Oct 2002 Posts: 1,581 Internets: 6603	i've cock slapped my girlfriend before. a couple times actually.

05-30-2005, 08:41 PM	#5 (permalink)
Repugnant Abomination Almost there... Join Date: Feb 2005 Posts: 5,979 Internets: 164547	Well certainly a more rigid approach will act as a more blunt weapon to strike with. Rather then a resounding slap you would get sort of a dull sounding thud. I guess it's just a personal preference.

06-01-2005, 11:59 AM	#10 (permalink)
ninjaface Level 20 Holothetan Join Date: Dec 2002 Location: Space Posts: 5,245 Internets: 210144	Are bonus points awarded for bruising?

06-01-2005, 01:38 PM	#13 (permalink)
Ironic Mustache G'd up from the feet up. Join Date: Jan 2005 Location: Cali Posts: 7,146 Supreme Emperor of the Jiu Jitsu Shit Forum?: Yes Internets: 114735	That struck me as a little odd too. You'll notice that everyone else references cock slapping a woman (except DCK, but he's exempt from all gay jokes because of his two chicks (except the spooning funglool jokes)).
	Creeping around as I please nonchalantly like any other Supreme Emperor might.

06-01-2005, 01:39 PM	#14 (permalink)
bloodyfart Senior Member Join Date: Apr 2005 Location: side control Posts: 2,044 Internets: 203	im gay so i pick up on those things.
	<b>We're here, and we're queer, so get used to it</b>

06-01-2005, 01:48 PM	#15 (permalink)
MAGICLIT Senior Member Join Date: Feb 2005 Location: city of sin Posts: 2,753 Internets: 10	Your father must be so proud.
	I am all in favor of a ruling class, especially since I rule.

06-01-2005, 02:00 PM	#16 (permalink)
Ironic Mustache G'd up from the feet up. Join Date: Jan 2005 Location: Cali Posts: 7,146 Supreme Emperor of the Jiu Jitsu Shit Forum?: Yes Internets: 114735	His father is the reason he's gay.
	Creeping around as I please nonchalantly like any other Supreme Emperor might.

06-01-2005, 02:00 PM	#17 (permalink)
MAGICLIT Senior Member Join Date: Feb 2005 Location: city of sin Posts: 2,753 Internets: 10	Oh, like Francis?
	I am all in favor of a ruling class, especially since I rule.

06-01-2005, 05:03 PM	#21 (permalink)
Ironic Mustache G'd up from the feet up. Join Date: Jan 2005 Location: Cali Posts: 7,146 Supreme Emperor of the Jiu Jitsu Shit Forum?: Yes Internets: 114735	Taking a piss isn't a sexual act either but you wouldn't go holding another man's shlong for him. I wouldn't want my shlong on some dude's face, anymore than I'd want some dude's shlong anywhere near me.
	Creeping around as I please nonchalantly like any other Supreme Emperor might.

06-01-2005, 06:08 PM	#22 (permalink)
bloodyfart Senior Member Join Date: Apr 2005 Location: side control Posts: 2,044 Internets: 203	very true.
	<b>We're here, and we're queer, so get used to it</b>

06-01-2005, 06:20 PM	#23 (permalink)
MAGICLIT Senior Member Join Date: Feb 2005 Location: city of sin Posts: 2,753 Internets: 10	I personally like shlongs near me.
	I am all in favor of a ruling class, especially since I rule.

06-01-2005, 06:33 PM	#24 (permalink)
bloodyfart Senior Member Join Date: Apr 2005 Location: side control Posts: 2,044 Internets: 203	we know
	<b>We're here, and we're queer, so get used to it</b>

06-01-2005, 06:40 PM	#25 (permalink)
MAGICLIT Senior Member Join Date: Feb 2005 Location: city of sin Posts: 2,753 Internets: 10	O, and i like vaginas.
	I am all in favor of a ruling class, especially since I rule.