showers - Nubblies.net Forums

Lucy Fur · 10-09-2005, 04:18 PM

Shower Like a Woman

Take off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper according to lights and darks.

Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown. If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.

Look at your womanly physique in the mirror - make mental note to do more sit-ups / leg-lifts, etc.

Get in the shower. Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long loofah, wide loofah and pumice stone.

Wash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added vitamins.

Wash your hair again to make sure it's clean.

Condition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner enhanced.

Wash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes until red.

Wash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash.

Rinse conditioner off hair.

Shave armpits and legs.

Turn off shower. Squeegee off all wet surfaces in shower. Spray mold spots with Tilex. Get out of shower. Dry with towel the size of a small country.

Wrap hair in super absorbent towel.

Return to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head.

If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
How to Shower Like a Man

Take off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave them in a pile.

Walk naked to the bathroom.

If you see wife along the way, shake wiener at her making the 'woo-woo' sound.

Look at your manly physique in the mirror. Admire the size of your wiener and scratch your ass.

Get in the shower.

Wash your face.

Wash your armpits.

Blow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse them off.

Fart and laugh at how loud it sounds in the shower.

Spend majority of time washing privates and surrounding area.

Wash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs stuck on the soap.

Wash your hair. Make a Shampoo Mohawk.

Pee.

Rinse off and get out of shower.

Partially dry off. Fail to notice water on floor because curtain was hanging out of tub the whole time.

Admire wiener size in mirror again.

Leave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan on.

Return to bedroom with towel around waist. If you pass wife, pull off towel, shake wiener at her and make the 'woo-woo' sound again.

Throw wet towel on bed.

Carnivorous Flavor · 10-09-2005, 06:58 PM

sounds good to me.

Lucy Fur · 10-09-2005, 07:14 PM

woo-woo?

[ October 09, 2005, 05:15 PM: Message edited by: Lucy Fur ]

10-09-2005, 07:22 PM

Woooooo Wooooooo

Beebs · 10-09-2005, 08:01 PM

Shower like Beebs

Black out after going to bars with Gnasty
climb in shower
fall into shower curtain
rip said curtain completely off metal hoops
have said metal hoops break, and puncture your skin
bloody your nose on the way down
climb into bed.

theMerciless1 · 10-09-2005, 09:36 PM

i like to put my ass up against the wet tile wall when i fart. the farty-slapping noise cracks me up.

Niger Angelus · 10-13-2005, 11:00 PM

Women, don't forget to shave that vag too.

Orgazmo · 10-13-2005, 11:59 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by theMerciless1:
i like to put my ass up against the wet tile wall when i fart. the farty-slapping noise cracks me up.

Me too. I haven't done this in a long while...thanks for the reminder. I also piss first thing everytime...no exceptions. If I don't have to piss, I stand there until I can muster a dribble.

angry pancake · 10-14-2005, 12:26 AM

showering is for pussies

Orgazmo · 10-14-2005, 12:33 AM

Indirectly...

Showering is for my cock => My cock is for pussies

Niger Angelus · 10-14-2005, 03:17 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Orgazmo:
I also piss first thing everytime...no exceptions. If I don't have to piss, I stand there until I can muster a dribble.

I always piss first thing too, I think it is just something about the feel of the water...

[ October 14, 2005, 01:19 PM: Message edited by: Niger Angelus ]

MAGICLIT · 10-14-2005, 03:33 PM

well Niger, next time one of your buddies is passed out after a drunken night, take a warm glass of water, take ur buddies hand, and stick a few fingers in the water, he is guaranteed to piss himself.

Niger Angelus · 10-14-2005, 04:45 PM

Oh, don't worry, already been done.

10-09-2005, 04:18 PM	#1 (permalink)
Lucy Fur Empress Magnificent Join Date: Jul 2005 Location: Florida Posts: 825 Internets: 349	Shower Like a Woman Take off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper according to lights and darks. Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown. If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas. Look at your womanly physique in the mirror - make mental note to do more sit-ups / leg-lifts, etc. Get in the shower. Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long loofah, wide loofah and pumice stone. Wash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added vitamins. Wash your hair again to make sure it's clean. Condition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner enhanced. Wash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes until red. Wash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash. Rinse conditioner off hair. Shave armpits and legs. Turn off shower. Squeegee off all wet surfaces in shower. Spray mold spots with Tilex. Get out of shower. Dry with towel the size of a small country. Wrap hair in super absorbent towel. Return to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head. If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ How to Shower Like a Man Take off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave them in a pile. Walk naked to the bathroom. If you see wife along the way, shake wiener at her making the 'woo-woo' sound. Look at your manly physique in the mirror. Admire the size of your wiener and scratch your ass. Get in the shower. Wash your face. Wash your armpits. Blow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse them off. Fart and laugh at how loud it sounds in the shower. Spend majority of time washing privates and surrounding area. Wash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs stuck on the soap. Wash your hair. Make a Shampoo Mohawk. Pee. Rinse off and get out of shower. Partially dry off. Fail to notice water on floor because curtain was hanging out of tub the whole time. Admire wiener size in mirror again. Leave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan on. Return to bedroom with towel around waist. If you pass wife, pull off towel, shake wiener at her and make the 'woo-woo' sound again. Throw wet towel on bed.
	I am chaos. It is my destiny to destroy.

10-09-2005, 06:58 PM	#2 (permalink)
Carnivorous Flavor Senior Member Join Date: Jan 2005 Location: tracking schroeder Posts: 703 Internets: 10	sounds good to me.
	i'm the sinful stench that wafts through nostrils of the righteous....

10-09-2005, 07:14 PM	#3 (permalink)
Lucy Fur Empress Magnificent Join Date: Jul 2005 Location: Florida Posts: 825 Internets: 349	woo-woo? [ October 09, 2005, 05:15 PM: Message edited by: Lucy Fur ]
	I am chaos. It is my destiny to destroy.

10-09-2005, 07:22 PM	#4 (permalink)
DJ FC Guest Posts: n/a	Woooooo Wooooooo
DJ FC Guest Posts: n/a

10-09-2005, 09:36 PM	#6 (permalink)
theMerciless1 Senior Member Join Date: May 2005 Location: ming\'s palace Posts: 1,495 Internets: 412	i like to put my ass up against the wet tile wall when i fart. the farty-slapping noise cracks me up.
	i who have nothing but the comfort of my sins

10-09-2005, 08:01 PM	#5 (permalink)
Beebs Poor Sport Join Date: Feb 2004 Location: Indianapolis / Middlebury / Long Lake Posts: 5,306 Internets: 127341	Shower like Beebs Black out after going to bars with Gnasty climb in shower fall into shower curtain rip said curtain completely off metal hoops have said metal hoops break, and puncture your skin bloody your nose on the way down climb into bed.

10-13-2005, 11:00 PM	#7 (permalink)
Niger Angelus We still believe. Join Date: Oct 2002 Location: Indiana Posts: 4,697 Internets: 216	Women, don't forget to shave that vag too.
	I enjoy knives and fire.

10-14-2005, 12:33 AM	#10 (permalink)
Orgazmo COME ON YOU YANKS Join Date: Feb 2002 Location: Indiana Posts: 15,733 Internets: 311447	Indirectly... Showering is for my cock => My cock is for pussies

10-14-2005, 03:33 PM	#12 (permalink)
MAGICLIT Senior Member Join Date: Feb 2005 Location: city of sin Posts: 2,753 Internets: 10	well Niger, next time one of your buddies is passed out after a drunken night, take a warm glass of water, take ur buddies hand, and stick a few fingers in the water, he is guaranteed to piss himself.
	I am all in favor of a ruling class, especially since I rule.

10-14-2005, 04:45 PM	#13 (permalink)
Niger Angelus We still believe. Join Date: Oct 2002 Location: Indiana Posts: 4,697 Internets: 216	Oh, don't worry, already been done.
	I enjoy knives and fire.