Nubblies Gathering August 2k7

[Repugnant Abomination]

I might be able to swing a weekend trip down to Vegas. The only problem is money is tighter than a virgin's asshole. I'll do my best.

[Mr. Blonde]

Fair enough, I can't bash you for that, as that's the exact reason I couldn't go home this time around. But Lets plan this baish 2 months ahead so we can (those of us who need to) save up a bit. Although spending 300+ bucks on any one place is frankly just not going to happen with me. I'm a cheap ass and I certainly don't consort with stripper-folk. I might buy you fucks a few lapdances though.

[StabMaster Arson]

it's looking like I'll be there the week of halloween.

[Mr. Blonde]

Well that doesnt do the rest of us any good does it now stabby stab

[Cocktooth]

I was wrong and my GF let me know today. Its the 16th we are flying in on. We will get there around 11 Vegas time.

[Mr. Blonde]

Okay fuckers, are none of you interested in strippers gambling and massive alcohol consumption in the biggest party location in the united fucking states or what?

[Beebs]

Originally Posted by Mr. Blonde

Okay fuckers, are none of you interested in strippers gambling and massive alcohol consumption in the biggest party location in the united fucking states or what?

I'm still not right from this weekend.

I pry won't be able to make it to vegas, but if I did I would never come back, even if i tried.

[f3lix]

pussy.

[Repugnant Abomination]

I'm interested Blonde, if only for the chance to gaze into your sweet, sweet eyes.

[Mr. Blonde]

get enough drinks in me and stare me with those luscious eyebrows of yours for too long you might get more than you bargained for, pretty boy

[SittinOnDubsWGW]

goddamn being stuck here in New Mexico until the end of October. I'm itching to go to vegas in the somewhat near future.

[THEINCREDIBLEdork]

Originally Posted by Mr. Blonde

Damn, i'm really starting to wish I could have made it home. Sounds like you guys had a fucking blast, I would have loved to have been there.

Yea Blonde, its was a fucking blast. In fact, I couldn't imagine having a better time. I'm actually really glad you didn't come. Because, logically, since it was already the perfect and funnest time I could possibly imagine, as it exactly happened, it likely wouldn't have been as fun if you had been there.

ID's memories and impressions:

Well what can I say? I probably had the best weekend I've had all summer last weekend. First off I'd like to note that my passion for cock, ball, and ass jokes reached an incredible peak last weekend. Like, thinking back, it was too much, even for someone who loves cock, ball, and assholes as much as I do... so sorry about that.

Well anyways, when I first arrived at Gaz's pad I was greeted by a bunch of drunken, giddy fools. UB made sure to point out what a girly car I drive as soon as I got out of my car, then we commenced with handshakes all around. I saw clearly that I had some catching up to do in the drinking department. I drove Gaz to the liquor store and we got some shit. I started the night out with a 211 like I always do when I am planning to get hammered and we played some fooseball. I had a great time shooting the shit. But the sad thing about this night is, I don't remember hardly a goddamn thing .

Last thing I vaguely remember is Tongue arriving to the bar. I was told by someone, i think ugly, to be a real dick to him when i first met him. I was game. But by the time he got there I was so stupid drunk the cleverest thing I could think of was to ram him. And ram him I did. I rammed the motherfucking fuck out of that fucking fuck. I also had a contest of inhibition with Gaz, who destroyed me handily. He really pulled out the big guns to win! Another thing I remember is chatting up this chick next to me, and gaz had my back and made me realize i was flurting with an ugly fatty who probably had the hiv. Thanks pal.

Next thing I knew I woke up at Gaz's place at like 10am. I quickly freaked the fuck out wondering if I left my Credit card at the bar. Fortunately I found my wallet on the floor with the card inside. Then hungover as fuck i drove to Indy to meet this chick I new from my NZ trip as I promised her. I of course got lost in town but managed to get to gazmos' just in the nick of time with only missing my first pick. Me and BDH were chilling upstairs, drafting because we couldn't get the internets downstairs. Eventually everyone joined us upstairs one at a time.

When Tongina finally entered the room, I recognized him from the night before and remembered who he was, but thats about it. I said, "Well hey there kitty kat." The look he gave me was priceless. I thought to myself, "Oh my god, I wonder what horrible things I put this poor guy though last night. He hates me."

But time heals all wounds, and after the draft was over, Tongue and I began probably the longest streak of fooseball wins ever in the world. We were unstoppable. Gods. But as UB put it, "mortal" gods, since we did end up losing one game. but that was just because i was getting bored and fed up with all the publicity of being a fooseball star, so I threw the game.

Gaz is really good at guitar hero.

My favorite part of the weekend was taking a shower in gaz's bathroom, because I could taste his musk on his towel.

Later, BDH and I coached UB on his first beer bong ever. It was a messy endeavor, but successful nonetheless, he took it like a champ, with minimal weeping.

The most hilarious part of the weekend was the trivia match between f3lix and bdh. Everything about it was hilarious. I always thought that people on those shows like jaywalking [i think thats his version] just acted stupid so theyd look funny and make it on tv. But no, those people really do exist, even here on nubblies. And with UB as the moderator it was like "Weakest Link" on steroids.

To give you an example of just how bad the contestants did, one of the questions was, "What continent is split nearly symmetrically by the Tropic of Capricorn?" F3lix guessed first and of course was wrong, BDH then guessed Europe, which is wrong. UB pipes in and says "Dear God, OK there are on 7 possible answers, I want you to keep guessing until you get the right answer. Do you even know seven continents?" BDH, with some labored thought, finally came up with Antartica.

I have never seen anyone so stimulated by alcohol than UB. At Steak N Shake he was fucking hilarious. BTW Steak and Shake sucked because that little fucking emo kid didn't bring my food until everyone was done eating. But I thought it was cool that he meowed at me at the register. Anyways, UB, the man is crazy. I could see no depressant effects of alcohol whatsoever. The guy loves the sound of his own voice, and rightly so. He is extremely expressive, eloquent, and their is an air of confidence and knowledge in what he has to say. He always seems like hes on a roll. I think he should go into broadcasting. I could see him on around the horn or commentating for poker games on TV. But he'd have to have to fight a lot of adversity because I don't think they'd ever let anyone that red on TV.

BDH is nothing like I expected. He's a blast to party with and probably one of the nicest and coolest guys you could ever meet. He's a fucking character.

You gotta give F3lix credit, the man takes so much shit from these guys while still standing. They actually call him Gayve all the time in real life, like, i don't think I heard anyone call him Dave except for me. He's a cool dude too, his self-deprecating fat jokes about himself were probably funnier than what BDH or anyone else could come up with.

There was some really weird guy that joined us at the titty bar who was a friend of meegs i think. While I was trying drown my face in titty, he kept insisting on small talk. I politely answered all of his questions, and made an effort not to be interesting at all or ask him questions, but apparently he still felt a special bond with me. When they got up and left he gave me a little wave.

The most surprising member in real life award goes to Tonguegina. For some reason I thought he was a dark, whiney, emo kid from my time on nubblies. But really, hes a sex kitten. There is really only one word to describe this guy, and that word is "Trooper." He drove half of us retards around saturday night and also kept score THE ENTIRE THREE HOURS of trivia by holding his hands up in the air.

Beebs was also a trooper, he drove and I think he ended up staying longer at the strip bar than he wanted to but took one for the team. I also saw him destroy f3lix with a featherweight in Fight Night.

If there is one thing I regret is that I didn't get to talk enough to Orgazmo. During the brief time I was sober I was busy playing the first 10 wins in fooseball and didn't get much of a chance to talk to him. I was planning on looking deep inside this great man but he is still a mystery meat to me. I've met him in real life once before, and at first glance you would have no idea he is the mastermind of the most debaucherous website in the world. He is very modest and subtle, quite the opposite of myself.

Anyways, great time. Gaz, thanks for hosting, UB thanks for all the drinks, Beebs thanks for driving, BDH thanks for the buying everyone all those dances, Tongue thanks for being clutch, f3lix thanks for not picking any of the good players in fantasy football. Hopefully the next gathering is sooner than later.

[Beebs]

Originally Posted by THEINCREDIBLEdork

Beebs was also a trooper, he drove and I think he ended up staying longer at the strip bar than he wanted to but took one for the team. I also saw him destroy f3lix with a featherweight in Fight Night.

Oh I wanted to stay I thouroughly enjoy leaving with a face full of glitter and smelling, as I told tongegina "of shame and abusive stepfathers", I just saw how uncomfortable other people looked and thought BDH and I were the only ones having a good time, well besides UB having a good time through humiliation and degredation of strippers, which was great.

[Ugly Bastard]

I swear I wasn't the one who told you to be mean to tonguegina. If I did, I don't remember.

Nice write-up. The best one yet.

[THEINCREDIBLEdork]

Originally Posted by Beebs

I just saw how uncomfortable other people looked and thought BDH and I were the only ones having a good time

Wow I was so trashed by that time i didn't even notice. UB started buying rounds faster than i could finish my last drink.

[Cocktooth]

I wish I would have went. I would have been there, had I not got done with softball at 11 O'clock and played all night. Im a pussy. I need my sleep.

[THEINCREDIBLEdork]

anyone notice bdh is mia from this thread? pry Still embarrassed that his ass was showing during the dance

[Repugnant Abomination]

This thread is making be a bitter Brian.

[Beebs]

Originally Posted by THEINCREDIBLEdork

anyone notice bdh is mia from this thread? pry Still embarrassed that his ass was showing during the dance

"So was my bare ass really showing?"

~BDH, 4500 times, minimum.

[BigDongedHoe]

I apologize for the late reply I was simply enjoying everyone elses account of a fantastic evening.

I arrived at casa de la Gaz' at approx. 2:30 P.M. on saturday afternoon. I had some trouble finding the apartment so one tonguegina took over the duties of walking outside so that I could see him standing to know where I was going, thanks for that. I hadn't seen tongue in a while so we had a small chit-chat on how things were going. I enter the house to encounter gaz' roomate and a drunk Ugly Bastard. The kicker on that is that UB claimed to still be wasted from the night before. How it is humanly possible that a person is still wasted without touching an alcoholic beverage for 10+ hours is beyond me but then again I suppose it could be possible. Anyways I caught up with UB and chatted for a while with thoughts in the back of my head wondering where Gaz, f3lix, ID, and Beebs were since I had heard they were all there the night before. UB informed me of the debauchery that had taken place the night before and said f3lix was "to much of a pussy to come downstairs." I immediately ran upstairs to greet f3lix after hearing that comment and gave a casual handshake to let him know everything I ever say is all in jest.

The day continued on for a bit after that and I cracked my first beer at approx. 2:45 p.m. then drafted the greatest fantasy football team known to planet earth. What can I say, I have a rather large penis. During that time I had the pleasure of meeting ID and slinging some draft shit. One of the highlights of the fantasy football draft was the fact that in our league we play two starting defenses. The great part about this is that all defenses are drafted and Jared Shaw only has one. Not to mention f3lix has two and both happen to be on the buy week in week 8.

After the draft I was noticing I was feeling a slight buzz at around 7:30. I'm not sure what time it was but I remember talking to UB about a time I bonged 6 beers at once. Maybe it was my slightly drunken state but I felt like he didn't believe me. I took it upon myself to bong 2 beers at once just a measure of proof. Afterwards I noticed that I had 1 beer left in my 12 pack and was rather disapointed that I had nothing to drink. The rest of the night prior to leaving consisted of trivia, fooseball, watching beebs woop ass in fight night (i'd like a rematching on xbox 360 in round 3 btw), and having the honor of sharing UBs first beer bong with him (gaz has a two hose beer bong so I took the other ened). I believe that ID was out there and bonged a few beers as well. The whole night I was pushing to go out and after UB had bonged his beer I could tell he was feeling more in the party mood. As mentioned above ID whooped his ass in a beer chugging contest, I suppose you could tell who the real drinkers were at that point. UB decided it was time to go (I was ready as well) and we made our way on out to Broad Ripple.

We arrived at Broad Ripple and I was starting to feel my party buzz increase and decided to take a piss on a nearby dumpster. As a side note I found it rather neat that i road in a car with Beebs, ID, and f3lix three guys that I had spent a collective 7 or 8 hours total with in my life up to that point rather then with the guys I graduated high school with. Once at broad ripple we went to some bar and paid a $5.00 cover. I immediately went to the bar and bought beebs and myself a shot. I offered for UB and tongue but both declined. Beebs and I did out washington apple shot and all was well. I then realized I should probably by the others shots so f3lix, ID, and myself did a shot of Rumplemintz. For those of you who do not know what that is, its 100 proof peppermint schnapps. At this point after my 12 pack of beer that started at 2:45 and one other plus 2 shots at the bar I'm officially wasted. The rest of the night moved a lot quicker after this point. I believe we stayed at this bar and maybe had a beer or two. Off to the Red Garter it was...

The Red Garter was unlike other strip clubs I had been too on sheer size alone. The talent was definitely a C or C+ in stripper terms but the times ranked up there as an A. I immediately sat down to get some dollar dances and realize everyone in our group was sitting in the corner. This simply would not work for me. I then got beebs up by me and bought him a dance as well as ID and Gina'. f3lix, UB, and Gaz' declined for such actions but I did notice that UB was feeding me beer, after beer, after beer, after beer. The night kinda flys by up until a point when I see High Roller (UB) go up and whisper something in the DJ's ear. As he's doing this I look over and see a guy on stage for his 22 birthday. He's in his boxers and has a boner, I thought that was funny. After this UB walks down hands me a beer and says "chug it". I do that and realize I'm feeling like I might throw up, I head to the bathroom pee and refresh myself. I come back and sit down and then here a voice from above say "Boonley report to the stage, we need Boonley." I jump at the opportunity and get up on stage. Next thing I know I'm shirtless, pantless, and in my favorite pair of camoflauge american eagle boxers. One thing I do remember is as the stripper takes my belt off I tell her to beat the ever living hell out of me with it. She tells me its against the rules and she'll get fired but I still encourage. I don't remember if she ever actually hit me with it because I was nearing blackout status at this point. The stripper has me get down on all fours and proceeds to pull the band of my boxers over my head. I guess my bare ass was hanging out on stage while she road me around and had me do push-ups with her on my back. I can say with 100% honesty I had no idea my bare ass was out. After the song I get my clothes back and walk down (bare assd) back to where we are sitting and put my clothes on. At this point I feel like half of my boxers are in my ass crack and the other half are bunched on my nuts. I flash a $5.00 bill in my hand and a heard of strippers run over like ethiopans might go after a plate of food. I tell a couple of them if they rip my boxers completely off of me I'll give them $5.00. They do me the favor and all is well. UB proceeds to tie the ass cracked boxers around his neck and I take a piece and put it around my wrist. The rest of the night at the stripclub is pretty hazy for me, but I do remember this little gem about UB. While high rolling UB has strippers sitting on his lap both on his right and left leg. UB is told he can get a handjob for $200 and he replies with a "a handjob fuck that, how much does it cost to fuck you." I found that rather amusing, and UB once again proved to me that strippers do indeed have a price. I do also remember walking out and getting real worked up at some homosexual who talked shit to UB. I didn't really care because I realized we had a bigger group than his, strength in #'s and liquid courage will always rule for me.

I pile into beebs car and remember arriving at a Steak and Shake. Those chronicles have already been talked about so I won't rehash anything thats already been said. It was awfully funny however how all of us ordered the same meal, a friscomelt. It tasted like a filet mignon to me as drunk as I was at that point.

Upon returning to Gazs' I crack another beer with ID and read this little gem right here http://nubblies.net/forums/showthrea...ghlight=jirafe

I want you to all realize that Gaz and I did this as an independent study our senior year of high school for a class. That is the actual version we turned into our teacher. How in the name of holy fuck we ever turned that in and got an A+ for the class is beyond me. How the teacher actually thought it was funny and didn't hash out any punishment is amazing as well. Gaz, ID, tongue, UB, and myself read this and I laughed harder than I have in years. That also made me realize how much of a joke high school was, and also how much fun it could be.

That was my 2:30 a.m. recap while half drunk. I apologize for spelling, grammar, and punctuation errors. I was more concerned with the content.

UB, Gaz, and tongue it was good to see all of you we should do it again sometime soon. UB a special thanks for paying for my strippertainment and also all my beers for the night, someday I hope to hit you back in the same mannner.

Beebs, f3lix, and ID it was nice to meet you all (f3lix for a second time) I had a great time with you and realized when looking through my phone I somehow acquired ID's # at somepoint in the evening. I'll give it a call if i'm ever in the greater bloomington area.

[Ugly Bastard]

Oh, I thought of a better way we could have pitted BDH and f3lix against each other: IQ tests. Granted there tends to be a lot of variance between the tests online, but we could have had them take like 3 each and then average their scores.

Over/under on the winning score at 102.

[f3lix]

In junior high I has 133 and junior year of high school was 138. Likely dropped a SD to 120 range due to lack of consistant brainstorming and intense mental workouts.

[THEINCREDIBLEdork]

were these with online tests?

[Ugly Bastard]

After witnessing your performance in the trivia contest, believing you can achieve those numbers in an IQ test seems highly improbable.

[f3lix]

Originally Posted by THEINCREDIBLEdork

were these with online tests?

No, they were administered with our academic team and used to widen our methods of problem solving. After the first test in junior high, I purchased an IQ testing computer program to help. My average score on that was actually 138, just as it was when I took it in high school. My dad took the one at home also and registered a 139. I smiled knowing the test is based on age and that it was unlikely for me to surpass him with gained knowledge in the future.

Originally Posted by Ugly Bastard

After witnessing your performance in the trivia contest, believing you can achieve those numbers in an IQ test seems highly improbable.

This doesn't surprise me, and I agree I would likely perform much worse today as I have not utilized critical thinking in quite a long time. I would like to remind you that IQ testing does not test overall knowledge but a combination of knowledge, process evaluation, and spacial reasoning. Fact memorizing in sports, history, and medical derivatives are not part of an IQ test.