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Unread 01-20-2003, 03:30 AM   #1 (permalink)
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At 10:44 pm, three Nubbelites (not Nubblites) were involved in an accident.

As tonguegina (with Orgazmo as a passenger) drove to the house of pliedes, Ugly Bastard tailed in his own vehicle. Whilst driving at approximately 30 mph, tonguegina spotted a deer running nearly parallel to him on the side of the road. Calmly saying "deer," tonguegina slammed on the breaks, sending the car into a controlled skid. Like a dumbass, the deer immediately merged into traffic yielding a collision. The deer struck/was struck by the left side of tonguegina's vehicle, promply followed by the right side, thus sending the best onto the windshield in front of Orgazmo and, eventually, over the roof of the car and onto the ground. The impact from the best caused the car to begin a small fishtail...a small fishtail that quickly grew into a large fishtail and ended with the car doing a 180 degree spin and travelling backward in the left lane. Ugly Bastard, who was tailing the vehicle at a distance estimated at 20 yards, applied the breaks heavily at first sign of lost control. Even with this, his best evasive techniques left a small amount of contact between the two vehicles. While tonguegina's stallion came to a halt, the wheels of Ugly Bastard continued into (and subsequently out of) a ditch before finally resting.

The local police were telephoned after the incident. The male officer that arrives had a striking resemblance to a police officer that has been seen in a famous video...but neither tonguegina nor Orgazmo could quite put their finger on just exactly who it was. Wow...now that I think about it...I think it's the cop from Family Vacation. Take away the glasses and trim up the hair a little bit. To those who saw the man, reply and tell me what you think.



Anyway, he was a nice. He looked over the damage, which was reasonably minimal to tonguegina's car and non-existant to Ugly Bastard's. Perhaps the funniest part of the entire situation was the dialogue between the officer and those at the scene. Pliedes, who drove down to the scene after hearing about it via cell phone, along with tonguegina were asking the police officer to mention the name "Nubblies" in the police report so that it would get in the paper. God bless their dedication.

After the incident, the trio went searching for the corpse of the deer...but it was left unfound. Instead, a small patch of disturbed snow was turned up, leaving us to believe that the deer is out there somewhere. If you ever see a heavily-mangled deer hobbling around, realize that sawing its neck off with a rusty blade and then mailing the product to tonguegina would probably yield a hefty reward.

Pictures of the scene were taken by local photgrapher Ugly Bastard. He personally assured me that they would be posted sometime tomorrow.

If anyone that was there remember something that was left out, feel free to add content...it would be much appreciated. Until next time, take care and God bless.

I left something out. Whilst waiting for the cop to come, at least 25 - 30 cars passed yet NO ONE offered any type of help. After the cop was there, Trout Sniffer was seen driving by very slowly, yet he failed to pause to say hello. Bastard. That's all.

[This message has been edited by Orgazmo (edited January 20, 2003).]
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Unread 01-20-2003, 03:44 AM   #2 (permalink)
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Orgazmo, thanks for taking the time to post about this incident. I was wondering what the fuck happened... man I wish I would have come home this weekend.

pliedes was just explaining to me the nubblies promoting, and that is funny as fuck.

Can't wait to see the pictures. Fuck, can't wait to come home again.
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Unread 01-20-2003, 03:45 AM   #3 (permalink)
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what road did this happen on?
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Unread 01-20-2003, 03:49 AM   #4 (permalink)
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Ah, so i'm sitting at the computer, posting on nubblies.blueoptic.com, when i get a phone call, it went something like this...
Pliedes - Ello?
Ugly Bastard - Yeah, we kinda got in a wreck, Tonguegina hit a deer, I hit tonguegina, so everything's good. *click*

Well, i was slightly awestruck, seeing as how these gentlemen were going supposed to rendevous at my house in a few minutes. After a quick call back to the good fella's involved, I quickly resolved to drive out and see what kind of help i could offer (or trouble i could cause).

Upon arrival, the cars seemed to be ok. The only think really hurt was my tax dollars. Seriously, two cops in two cars that take an hour just to file a tiny report, well, they didn't haul us in for our loud talk of insurance fraud, so they must've been alright. Things turned out ok, though the incident foiled our previous plans.

P.S. - If anyone wants some venison, I have a nice big deer hanging in my garage, though it has a little black car paint on the hide...
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Unread 01-20-2003, 03:50 AM   #5 (permalink)
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Well I'm pleased that no one was harmed. As to the mention of Nubblies in the police report, BEAUTIFUL. I'm just curious, where exactly did the "accident" occur?
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Unread 01-20-2003, 03:52 AM   #6 (permalink)
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1)This fucking deer needs to die.

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Orgazmo:
If you ever see a heavily-mangled deer hobbling around, realize that sawing its neck off with a rusty blade and then mailing the product to tonguegina would probably yield a hefty reward.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Definately. I want to see this bitch dead...the fucker owes me, what my dad estimated to be, over $2000.

2)Orgazmo, I knew leaving this post up to you would be for the best. A beautiful job, as usual.

3)Hahaha! That's it. I can't believe we didn't come up with the cop from Vacation that entire time...it was starting to get to me. Once again, good work Orgazmo.

4)Thanks pliedes for coming to the scene to chill with us as we waited on the cop.

5)Fuck yeah Nubblies should have been mentioned in the report. He'll be the best cop ever if it gets put in there.

6)Fuck the citezens, including Trout Sniffer, of the greater Warsaw and Winona Lake region that drove by for not stoping. I would now like to ask Orgazmo to cast them into the depths of hell...since he's dualy ordained and all, I figure he has that power.

7)Watch for the pictures. They should be amazing. We've got some of the hood of my car, some of the cops, one of some deer hair and snot that was on my windshield...it will be worth it.

8)It happened on Pierceton Road, half way between 250E. and Packerton Road.

[This message has been edited by tonguegina (edited January 20, 2003).]

[This message has been edited by Orgazmo (edited January 20, 2003).]
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Unread 01-20-2003, 03:52 AM   #7 (permalink)
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On Pierceton Road between 250 East and Packerton Rd, a little more east towards Packerton though...
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Unread 01-20-2003, 03:59 AM   #8 (permalink)
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Wow, thats like just down the road from my house... crazy.

Dont worry though, I have a pretty nice sized vehicle, If i see the gangly fucker I'll go off-road on his ass and give him a nice Nubblies "thank you".
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Unread 01-20-2003, 04:07 AM   #9 (permalink)
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Hey thanks St. Anky. It would be very much appreciated if you kicked it's ass for me.
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Unread 01-20-2003, 04:48 PM   #10 (permalink)
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I feel bad for not stopping. I slowed down very slow to see if I could recognize any of the cars or the people, but due to the fact that it was nearly 11:30 at night and very dark, I was not able to tell who it was. You guys have my deepest apologies for not stopping, as I did not realize who it was. You three know damn well that I would have stopped if I knew who it was. Once again, I do apologize.

Orgazmo, I think we're going to have to go deer hunting with our swords again, this deer will be special. Hope you three and the cars are alright.
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Unread 01-20-2003, 09:33 PM   #11 (permalink)
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I bring tidings of pictures.

The evening started out with a typical overly-energized Orgazmo, accompianated with a rather placid tonguegina:



Although virtually unvisible, you might be able to see some damage to the front, driver-side of Mr. tonguegina's car. (These pics aren't great, 'cause it was really dark, and the flash only goes so far, ya know....):



In this photograph, you can see Mr. Ugly Bastard's vehicle in the exact position it was post-wreck. Upon careful inspection, you can maybe see the tire tracks coming out of the ditch that Mr. Ugly was in just a few short moments before this was captured on film:



The best part of the whole thing is we got to see a real life police-officer:



In this, the final picture of the roll, you can see a hair from the bastardly deer, which ended up on the windshield of the tonguegina mobile:



This is local photographer Ugly Bastard signing off, God Bless.

-Ugly Bastard

PS: The first pic has the faces mosaquized out, thataway nobody finds out who those guys really are! (Thank Orgazmo for the work on those pics).

[This message has been edited by Ugly Bastard (edited January 20, 2003).]
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Unread 01-20-2003, 10:24 PM   #12 (permalink)
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hahaha, godbless adobe, the blurred faces make me laugh.

good work ub... and may the deer repel away from all of you from now on...

HAHA! the "typically over-energized Orgazmo" has something coming out of his mouth, it's pink and wet...



[This message has been edited by Titan (edited January 20, 2003).]
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Unread 01-20-2003, 10:40 PM   #13 (permalink)
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<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>hahaha, godbless adobe<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Indeed. Unfortunately it appears as if I missed tonguegina's reflection in the windshield. Consider it taken care of.

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>the "typically over-energized Orgazmo" has something coming out of his mouth<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

I'm impressed. Even after years of watching the Howard Stern show, I do not think I would have been able to tell what was going on behind those tiles...
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Unread 01-20-2003, 10:45 PM   #14 (permalink)
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I didn't even notice the reflection...

as for peering through the mosaic...
This is an exact quote from the song "Earthcrosser" by Veruca Salt, "Bedroom eyes lead to blurry vision, blurry vision."
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Unread 01-21-2003, 01:29 AM   #15 (permalink)
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Great job on the pics. Ugly Bastard. I like the blurred faces. I'm sure people could figure out from the RHCP t-shirt and the kick ass jacket who I am, but I could really care less.

I would like to point out that in the picture where I'm pointing out the deer hair and snot that my hand looks like none other than the cold hand of Death. I guess that's what happens when you're 5'10'' and 130lbs.
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Unread 01-21-2003, 01:32 AM   #16 (permalink)
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<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by tonguegina:
I would like to point out that in the picture where I'm pointing out the deer hair and snot that my hand looks like none other than the cold hand of Death. I guess that's what happens when you're 5'10'' and 130lbs.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>


It's either that, or the flash-bulb that went off six inches from your hand....one of the two.

-Ugly Bastard
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Unread 01-21-2003, 01:32 AM   #17 (permalink)
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except in the reflection, it's not so lifeless...
interesting...
it's sort of like how vampires don't have reflections... except... not...... at all..........
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Unread 01-21-2003, 01:49 AM   #18 (permalink)
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Wow. Great coverage by all. Fantastic.

Hey, tonguegina, at least when the deer hit you, it didn't poop all over the place. My sister hit a deer coming back from South Bend a few years ago, and the deer basically exploded.....in poop. I don't remember seeing any blood stains. Just a fuckload of shit. It was incredibly disgusting.
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Unread 01-21-2003, 01:50 AM   #19 (permalink)
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<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Ugly Bastard:

It's either that, or the flash-bulb that went off six inches from your hand....one of the two.

-Ugly Bastard
<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Do flash-bulbs make you look thinner? That was my point, not that it was white. I was just pointing out that I looked boney and pointy.
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Unread 01-21-2003, 01:52 AM   #20 (permalink)
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<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by tonguegina:
Do flash-bulbs make you look thinner? That was my point, not that it was white. I was just pointing out that I looked boney and pointy.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Ah, my bad. When I look at that hand, all I see is a big white blur. I cannot distinguish individual fingers (unless I am looking at the reflection).

But yes, you are skinny.

-Ugly Bastard

[This message has been edited by Ugly Bastard (edited January 20, 2003).]
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Unread 01-21-2003, 02:07 AM   #21 (permalink)
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My first thought when I looked at it was that Death was pointing out his next victom. The pointy the boney...you know.
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Unread 01-21-2003, 02:11 AM   #22 (permalink)
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It all makes sense to me now.
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