UB, Blonde, and SittinOn's Drunken Followalong Thread - Nubblies.net Forums

Ugly Bastard · 02-20-2009, 02:25 PM

Blonde, SittinOn, and myself will be in Phoenix tonight. There will almost certainly come a time, in between Blonde's autistic wall-punching spazzouts and SittinOn's suggestions to do another shot, where I will become incredibly bored and pull my iPhone out of my pocket. When I do this, I will come to this thread and make random posts about anything pertaining to our evening.

These posts will suck. They will not be interesting. I don't know where you are. I don't know why you're reading this. If you are looking to be entertained, I can tell you that you won't be. But what I can tell you is something about your night. This is knowledge I have acquired over a long social career. A career that has taught me something about people's lives. If you leave this thread now, I will not subject you to what I'm about to say. But if you're still here, I want you to know that, without a doubt, our night will almost certainly be better than yours.

SittinOnDubsWGW · 02-20-2009, 03:33 PM

get your ass up here sir!

BigDongedHoe · 02-20-2009, 06:53 PM

Stories of a train run on a hooker would be entertaining.... MAKE IT HAPPEN!

f3lix · 02-20-2009, 09:08 PM

CHOO CHOO

Mr. Blonde · 02-20-2009, 11:11 PM

We're sitting at a restaurant right now with 3 other people, sittinon is telling stories about his border patrol shit, ugly bastard is texting some 50 year old in overalls to try and fuck her tonight. I'm working on getting wasted.

Ugly Bastard · 02-21-2009, 06:19 AM

Wow. Let's just say I was never bored tonight. Pictures of Blonde in handcuffs coming soon. And I'm not kidding.

DDTempest · 02-21-2009, 06:49 AM

Handcuff pics please?

SittinOnDubsWGW · 02-21-2009, 07:18 AM

Yes, blonde got handcuffed. If it weren't for my federal agent friend, we both would be in jail

i got punched in the face. twice. by a big black bouncer. We went to IHOP where i tried to order an All American Slam. "This is not dennys" goddamnit why not???? I said racial slurs. Blonde got pissed. I don't know after that.

The theme of the night was me losing shit. Wallet. Keys. ID. it all happened.

I look forward to tomorrow night with Scottsdale shenanigans.

SittinOnDubsWGW · 02-21-2009, 07:22 AM

PS

UB had an Aussie frie nd tonight, and I pulled the "yeah, I work for Homeland Security and I hate to be 'that guy' but I'm gonna have to check your immigration status."

without missing a beat the guy pulled out his ID,visa, passport, and his I94. "well done sir, I was just fucking around, but you've actually got your shit together." Although that fucker didn't drink the free beers that were givin to him.

DJ FC · 02-21-2009, 08:13 AM

pics of blonde in cuffs pls or it didn't happen

SittinOnDubsWGW · 02-21-2009, 01:04 PM

UB has those pics. I only have drunk pics of us before getting kicked out. And I don't have the cord to upload w/ me. Fail.

SittinOnDubsWGW · 02-21-2009, 01:25 PM

While at the restaurant, UB decided to hit on a group of chicks that were clearly in HS. EVERYONE on the patio started cracking up. Realizing this, he says something along the lines "my lawyer is advising me to no longer talk to you guys." One of them aggressively says "Im 18, so i'm legal."

"guys, is this really happening?"

hahahaha

Mr. Blonde · 02-21-2009, 01:54 PM

Okay, so we were at the Big Bang, a piano bar here in Tempe, when I look up and see Sittinondubs dancing on stage (pics are on his camera..i'll try and get his SD card from him tonight and upload them) like a madman. After the song ends, like 3 bouncers surround him and basically tell him he needs to leave. I go to ask a question and some big black one just puts his hand up with a *stop* motion like straight out of a movie. Whatever, dude.

Anyways they escorted him to the top of the stairs and by the bar so he could close out his tab, and I asked one of the bouncers (i'm still fairly sober at this point compared to the group) what was going on? He says "I don't know" and I said something to the effect of..."Well he's not exactly resisting, why are there so many bouncers right here if you guys don't even know why he's getting kicked out?" (more bouncers had amassed at this point). Basically the guy didn't like being asked questions like "why is this happening" and then told me to leave. I was only about ten feet from the door, but once again I asked him why. "Okay, thats fine, i'll go, but I don't understand why. I

literally

haven't done anything but talk to you. You can force me out if you want, but I'd like to know why you're throwing me out instead of just having a discussion with me."

I should have known better honestly because in my experience out here bouncers do NOT like answering for themselves or conversing at all and will throw you out if there is any sort of dissension in opinion whatsoever, because for them its easier to do than explain with logic and reason. Either way, he ended up grabbing my arms and forcing me out, and then another one grabbed my legs and dragged me up the stairs (it was a basement bar). The reason they did this was because I told myself if they were going to forcefully kick me out I wasn't going to help them so I pretty much went limp. I thought they would just kick me out at this point, but apparently that wasn't enough for them.

The bouncer proceeded to put me on the pavement, basically face down, and call the cops, which at this point I decided not to say anything at all. I saw the cops come up on their bikes and then they cuffed me and stood me up and asked questions about what happened and everything. I sat on the curb and talked to them for about 15 minutes while Sittinondubs was on the curb about 10 feet next to me (uncuffed) talking about how one of the bouncers punched him in the face. His other border patrol friend, Hector, was being calm about the situation and explaining it to another cop. Ugly Bastard was in the bathroom this whole time and came out and didn't see anybody and got a text from his sister "Blonde is in handcuffs" at which point he proceeded to come out and take pictures of the debacle, soon to come when he gets to his computer.

I was calm and wasn't causing any problems this entire time, on top of the fact that I was being polite and also not drunk, and between Hector flashing his federal badge and the cops probably asking why this guy is in handcuffs, and asking a couple of witnesses they basically uncuffed me and told me to go to another bar. I should add that this is EXTREMELY rare to be let go, as everytime i've seen someone get cuffed on Mill they end up getting breathalyzed and picked up in a squad car.

Then we went to another bar for a bit in which Sittinondubs was WASTED and kept smacking girls asses and jumping up on fences and then we went to IHOP to eat with these chicks we met. Some racial slurs happened then we went home.

I distinctly remember a point when Sittinondubs walked out saw me in cuffs, and said very loudly "What the fuck...he's the most innocent one here!!"

SittinOnDubsWGW · 02-21-2009, 02:17 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Mr. Blonde

Then we went to another bar for a bit in which Sittinondubs was WASTED and kept smacking girls asses and jumping up on fences.

I don't recall this. Where were we. I remember being on the curb talking to the cops, then it skips to IHOP. Speaking of which, I think my credit card is still there. Fuck.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Mr. Blonde

I distinctly remember a point when Sittinondubs walked out saw me in cuffs, and said very loudly "What the fuck...he's the most innocent one here!!"

HAHAHA

Mr. Blonde · 02-21-2009, 02:32 PM

It was after we left the bar we got kicked out of, we went to another one where I gave you a cider and we met those chicks. When we were hanging out outside afterwards you kept trying to climb the fence to get back in bc you thought you left your credit card there, which you probably did.

Ugly Bastard · 02-21-2009, 02:45 PM

The best part of all: we're doing it all over again tonight!!

Pics coming. At lunch.

Quickie iPhone version of last night from my perspective: everything awesome, I go pee, come back out... Blonde in handcuffs, cops everywhere, I think I saw some news reporters.

WHAT THE FUCK?!?! :-O

I felt SO guilty this morning like we did something really bad, but I can't figure out what it was?!?!??!

Mr. Blonde · 02-21-2009, 02:50 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Ugly Bastard

I felt SO guilty this morning like we did something really bad, but I can't figure out what it was?!?!??!

This. Fucking guilt based society blows cock.

DDTempest · 02-21-2009, 05:01 PM

Blonde in handcuffs please. I will not ask again.

SittinOnDubsWGW · 02-21-2009, 06:22 PM

nevermind this post.

Mr. Blonde · 02-21-2009, 06:35 PM

Here are some of the pics...i'll post more as they get sent to me from UB's shitty iPhone:

This is right when they are releasing me. I would have posed but didn't realize UB was taking pictures and was kind of preoccupied at the moment. It would have been cool to have gotten a picture of a cop with his knee in my back and my face on the pavement, though.

Funniest part when they let me go. "Now, one of your friends still has to close out his tab, but while thats going on I suggest you take your friend here *nods to Sittinondubs* to another bar to calm him down. I tried talking to him but couldn't really get much out of him besides saying that one of the bouncers punched him in the face over and over."

To be fair, Sittinondubs was REALLY, REALLY drunk. I'll get his SD card later tonight and upload pictures of what he got kicked out for.

For the record, obviously they didn't cuff me for "no reason"...apparently in Tempe once a bouncer tells you to leave, and you don't willingly comply, they can book you for misdemeanor trespassing. I didn't know this of course, I was more on the mindset "Well, if he's going to kick me out i'm going to make him work for it and physically do it." It was my last night there, I really didn't have a lot of dignity I cared about keeping. This was apparently why I got cuffed.

Mr. Blonde · 02-21-2009, 07:25 PM

Sittinoncurbs

DDTempest · 02-21-2009, 08:45 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Mr. Blonde

Funniest part when they let me go ...

No funniest part is you being handcuffed by a bicycle chick cop with that lame little ponytail!

Mr. Blonde · 02-21-2009, 09:04 PM

She didn't handcuff me, she was just a senior officer or something.

UPDATE: Ugly Bastard has apparently lost his ID and unless he can find it in 3 hours he probably won't be able to come out tonight.

DDTempest · 02-21-2009, 09:19 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Mr. Blonde

UPDATE: Ugly Bastard has apparently lost his ID and unless he can find it in 3 hours he probably won't be able to come out tonight.

Or fly home?

Mr. Blonde · 02-21-2009, 09:26 PM

UPDATE:He found it. It was more complicated than just flying home because he's only stopping into Phoenix on the way to a Vegas tournament. He wouldn't have been able to do that either if he hadn't found it. GAME ON MOTHERFUCKERS.

02-20-2009, 02:25 PM	#1 (permalink)
Ugly Bastard Senior Member Join Date: Feb 2002 Location: U.S.A. Posts: 13,643 Internets: 247330	UB, Blonde, and SittinOn's Drunken Followalong Thread Blonde, SittinOn, and myself will be in Phoenix tonight. There will almost certainly come a time, in between Blonde's autistic wall-punching spazzouts and SittinOn's suggestions to do another shot, where I will become incredibly bored and pull my iPhone out of my pocket. When I do this, I will come to this thread and make random posts about anything pertaining to our evening. These posts will suck. They will not be interesting. I don't know where you are. I don't know why you're reading this. If you are looking to be entertained, I can tell you that you won't be. But what I can tell you is something about your night. This is knowledge I have acquired over a long social career. A career that has taught me something about people's lives. If you leave this thread now, I will not subject you to what I'm about to say. But if you're still here, I want you to know that, without a doubt, our night will almost certainly be better than yours.

02-20-2009, 06:53 PM	#3 (permalink)
BigDongedHoe Sex Kitten Milf fuuucck Join Date: Feb 2002 Location: Denver, CO Posts: 3,704 Internets: 55974	Stories of a train run on a hooker would be entertaining.... MAKE IT HAPPEN!
	There's life and then there is Cubs baseball, it's a chore to seperate the two.

02-21-2009, 07:18 AM	#8 (permalink)
SittinOnDubsWGW I make bad decisions. Join Date: Dec 2004 Location: The Desert Posts: 3,018 Internets: 108015	Yes, blonde got handcuffed. If it weren't for my federal agent friend, we both would be in jail i got punched in the face. twice. by a big black bouncer. We went to IHOP where i tried to order an All American Slam. "This is not dennys" goddamnit why not???? I said racial slurs. Blonde got pissed. I don't know after that. The theme of the night was me losing shit. Wallet. Keys. ID. it all happened. I look forward to tomorrow night with Scottsdale shenanigans.
	Last edited by SittinOnDubsWGW; 02-21-2009 at 07:23 AM.

02-21-2009, 08:13 AM	#10 (permalink)
DJ FC MURICAN Join Date: Jul 2004 Location: Virginia Posts: 5,136 Internets: 253094	pics of blonde in cuffs pls or it didn't happen
	The basis of our governments being the opinion of the people, the very first object should be to keep that right; and were it left to me to decide whether we should have a government without newspapers, or newspapers without a government, I should not hesitate a moment to prefer the latter. But I should mean that every man should receive those papers and be capable of reading them.

02-21-2009, 01:54 PM	#13 (permalink)
Mr. Blonde Spice Master Join Date: Jan 2004 Posts: 17,969 Internets: 284106	Okay, so we were at the Big Bang, a piano bar here in Tempe, when I look up and see Sittinondubs dancing on stage (pics are on his camera..i'll try and get his SD card from him tonight and upload them) like a madman. After the song ends, like 3 bouncers surround him and basically tell him he needs to leave. I go to ask a question and some big black one just puts his hand up with a stop motion like straight out of a movie. Whatever, dude. Anyways they escorted him to the top of the stairs and by the bar so he could close out his tab, and I asked one of the bouncers (i'm still fairly sober at this point compared to the group) what was going on? He says "I don't know" and I said something to the effect of..."Well he's not exactly resisting, why are there so many bouncers right here if you guys don't even know why he's getting kicked out?" (more bouncers had amassed at this point). Basically the guy didn't like being asked questions like "why is this happening" and then told me to leave. I was only about ten feet from the door, but once again I asked him why. "Okay, thats fine, i'll go, but I don't understand why. I literally haven't done anything but talk to you. You can force me out if you want, but I'd like to know why you're throwing me out instead of just having a discussion with me." I should have known better honestly because in my experience out here bouncers do NOT like answering for themselves or conversing at all and will throw you out if there is any sort of dissension in opinion whatsoever, because for them its easier to do than explain with logic and reason. Either way, he ended up grabbing my arms and forcing me out, and then another one grabbed my legs and dragged me up the stairs (it was a basement bar). The reason they did this was because I told myself if they were going to forcefully kick me out I wasn't going to help them so I pretty much went limp. I thought they would just kick me out at this point, but apparently that wasn't enough for them. The bouncer proceeded to put me on the pavement, basically face down, and call the cops, which at this point I decided not to say anything at all. I saw the cops come up on their bikes and then they cuffed me and stood me up and asked questions about what happened and everything. I sat on the curb and talked to them for about 15 minutes while Sittinondubs was on the curb about 10 feet next to me (uncuffed) talking about how one of the bouncers punched him in the face. His other border patrol friend, Hector, was being calm about the situation and explaining it to another cop. Ugly Bastard was in the bathroom this whole time and came out and didn't see anybody and got a text from his sister "Blonde is in handcuffs" at which point he proceeded to come out and take pictures of the debacle, soon to come when he gets to his computer. I was calm and wasn't causing any problems this entire time, on top of the fact that I was being polite and also not drunk, and between Hector flashing his federal badge and the cops probably asking why this guy is in handcuffs, and asking a couple of witnesses they basically uncuffed me and told me to go to another bar. I should add that this is EXTREMELY rare to be let go, as everytime i've seen someone get cuffed on Mill they end up getting breathalyzed and picked up in a squad car. Then we went to another bar for a bit in which Sittinondubs was WASTED and kept smacking girls asses and jumping up on fences and then we went to IHOP to eat with these chicks we met. Some racial slurs happened then we went home. I distinctly remember a point when Sittinondubs walked out saw me in cuffs, and said very loudly "What the fuck...he's the most innocent one here!!"
	Last edited by Mr. Blonde; 02-21-2009 at 02:06 PM.

02-20-2009, 03:33 PM	#2 (permalink)
SittinOnDubsWGW I make bad decisions. Join Date: Dec 2004 Location: The Desert Posts: 3,018 Internets: 108015	get your ass up here sir!

02-20-2009, 09:08 PM	#4 (permalink)
f3lix Gangnam Style Join Date: Oct 2003 Location: DH's Massage Parlor Posts: 6,383 Internets: 213510	CHOO CHOO

02-20-2009, 11:11 PM	#5 (permalink)
Mr. Blonde Spice Master Join Date: Jan 2004 Posts: 17,969 Internets: 284106	We're sitting at a restaurant right now with 3 other people, sittinon is telling stories about his border patrol shit, ugly bastard is texting some 50 year old in overalls to try and fuck her tonight. I'm working on getting wasted.

02-21-2009, 06:19 AM	#6 (permalink)
Ugly Bastard Senior Member Join Date: Feb 2002 Location: U.S.A. Posts: 13,643 Internets: 247330	Wow. Let's just say I was never bored tonight. Pictures of Blonde in handcuffs coming soon. And I'm not kidding.

02-21-2009, 07:22 AM	#9 (permalink)
SittinOnDubsWGW I make bad decisions. Join Date: Dec 2004 Location: The Desert Posts: 3,018 Internets: 108015	PS UB had an Aussie frie nd tonight, and I pulled the "yeah, I work for Homeland Security and I hate to be 'that guy' but I'm gonna have to check your immigration status." without missing a beat the guy pulled out his ID,visa, passport, and his I94. "well done sir, I was just fucking around, but you've actually got your shit together." Although that fucker didn't drink the free beers that were givin to him.

02-21-2009, 01:04 PM	#11 (permalink)
SittinOnDubsWGW I make bad decisions. Join Date: Dec 2004 Location: The Desert Posts: 3,018 Internets: 108015	UB has those pics. I only have drunk pics of us before getting kicked out. And I don't have the cord to upload w/ me. Fail.

02-21-2009, 01:25 PM	#12 (permalink)
SittinOnDubsWGW I make bad decisions. Join Date: Dec 2004 Location: The Desert Posts: 3,018 Internets: 108015	While at the restaurant, UB decided to hit on a group of chicks that were clearly in HS. EVERYONE on the patio started cracking up. Realizing this, he says something along the lines "my lawyer is advising me to no longer talk to you guys." One of them aggressively says "Im 18, so i'm legal." "guys, is this really happening?" hahahaha

02-21-2009, 02:32 PM	#15 (permalink)
Mr. Blonde Spice Master Join Date: Jan 2004 Posts: 17,969 Internets: 284106	It was after we left the bar we got kicked out of, we went to another one where I gave you a cider and we met those chicks. When we were hanging out outside afterwards you kept trying to climb the fence to get back in bc you thought you left your credit card there, which you probably did.

02-21-2009, 02:45 PM	#16 (permalink)
Ugly Bastard Senior Member Join Date: Feb 2002 Location: U.S.A. Posts: 13,643 Internets: 247330	The best part of all: we're doing it all over again tonight!! Pics coming. At lunch. Quickie iPhone version of last night from my perspective: everything awesome, I go pee, come back out... Blonde in handcuffs, cops everywhere, I think I saw some news reporters. WHAT THE FUCK?!?! :-O I felt SO guilty this morning like we did something really bad, but I can't figure out what it was?!?!??!

02-21-2009, 06:22 PM	#19 (permalink)
SittinOnDubsWGW I make bad decisions. Join Date: Dec 2004 Location: The Desert Posts: 3,018 Internets: 108015	nevermind this post.
	Last edited by SittinOnDubsWGW; 02-21-2009 at 06:24 PM.

02-21-2009, 06:35 PM	#20 (permalink)
Mr. Blonde Spice Master Join Date: Jan 2004 Posts: 17,969 Internets: 284106	Here are some of the pics...i'll post more as they get sent to me from UB's shitty iPhone: This is right when they are releasing me. I would have posed but didn't realize UB was taking pictures and was kind of preoccupied at the moment. It would have been cool to have gotten a picture of a cop with his knee in my back and my face on the pavement, though. Funniest part when they let me go. "Now, one of your friends still has to close out his tab, but while thats going on I suggest you take your friend here nods to Sittinondubs to another bar to calm him down. I tried talking to him but couldn't really get much out of him besides saying that one of the bouncers punched him in the face over and over." To be fair, Sittinondubs was REALLY, REALLY drunk. I'll get his SD card later tonight and upload pictures of what he got kicked out for. For the record, obviously they didn't cuff me for "no reason"...apparently in Tempe once a bouncer tells you to leave, and you don't willingly comply, they can book you for misdemeanor trespassing. I didn't know this of course, I was more on the mindset "Well, if he's going to kick me out i'm going to make him work for it and physically do it." It was my last night there, I really didn't have a lot of dignity I cared about keeping. This was apparently why I got cuffed.
	Last edited by Mr. Blonde; 02-21-2009 at 08:12 PM.

02-21-2009, 07:25 PM	#21 (permalink)
Mr. Blonde Spice Master Join Date: Jan 2004 Posts: 17,969 Internets: 284106	Sittinoncurbs

02-21-2009, 09:04 PM	#23 (permalink)
Mr. Blonde Spice Master Join Date: Jan 2004 Posts: 17,969 Internets: 284106	She didn't handcuff me, she was just a senior officer or something. UPDATE: Ugly Bastard has apparently lost his ID and unless he can find it in 3 hours he probably won't be able to come out tonight.

02-21-2009, 09:26 PM	#25 (permalink)
Mr. Blonde Spice Master Join Date: Jan 2004 Posts: 17,969 Internets: 284106	UPDATE:He found it. It was more complicated than just flying home because he's only stopping into Phoenix on the way to a Vegas tournament. He wouldn't have been able to do that either if he hadn't found it. GAME ON MOTHERFUCKERS.