Crastur - Nubblies.net Forums

Orgazmo · 06-03-2003, 02:40 AM

Crastur lived up on a big ass mountain. He was about 5 ft. 3 in. tall and always hunched and shit like that. He also had a big ass beard. IT was white and shit. One day Crastur came down from the top of his big ass mountain and started walking on this big ass path. The bastard was so hunched. What a fucker. Anyway, it's raining and shit like a bitch and lightning yeah, so the crazy fucker takes his fucking pocket knife and throws it straight at a tree. Right at the damned tree! Haha, I'm sure you can imagine that was the last we ever saw of Crastur!

vader521 · 06-03-2003, 12:42 PM

Crastur that fucker...

Alpha · 09-12-2003, 02:25 AM

I sure wish Crastur would make a comeback.

Orgazmo · 09-12-2003, 02:32 AM

Didn't you read the story? He threw his knife into the tree! He's not coming back...

I could tell you the story of Donkler if you wish, though.

Donkler was a real son of a bitch. Yeah he was, a son of a bitch. Anyway, he lived in the middle of a really dense forest and shit because he didn't like to talk and stuff like that. Well, as only Donkler would, one day he went outside to fuck with some trees. You see, he didn't have stores and shit like that, so Donkler used the trees and shit to make his shit...like self sufficiency and shit. Anyway, he went out to fuck with the tree when he spotted a squirrel or something. Donkler, the poor fuck, goes up to the squirrel, quiet as a motherfucker, and picks the guy up. He thinks that the squirrel is going to like flip out and shit when it realizes that it's being fucked with...but it doesn't. Not knowing what the fuck is happening, Donkler actually flips out...thinking that it's a fake squirrel or that something is wrong or shit. I don't know. Anyway, Donkler goes crazy ape and throws the fucking squirrel right into the ground. Turns out that was a bad idea because the squirrel was really a knife, and the ground was really Donkler's foot. Yeah, the fucker threw a knife right into his foot. What a dumbass.

Alpha · 09-12-2003, 02:38 AM

That reminds me of Frample...

Frample was always picked on. Maybe it was his herpes, maybe the fact his snot was orange, or maybe because he was a Jew. Frample decided that he was going to go take a walk on the beach. Frample wants to be safe so he brings a raincoat... You can never be to sure in Texas, it rains a lot there. As Frample walked he notices a dead bear lying on the beach. Frample went over to it and poked it with a stick. The bear got up because it wasn't really dead, just very tired... Now the bear is pissed so it totally kicked Frample right in the nuts. Then devoured it's Frample's head. Frample died.

Titan · 09-14-2003, 09:43 PM

Zow.
Yorgazmo's Na Flucking Nenius.
Nliedes Fand My Splur Blaffing Kaboot Thart Floor Mours.

Somebody's ziggurat came over yesterday and stole all of my gum. I know you might be laughing now, but that seriously pissed me off. The last time a ziggurat came over I fucked her in her temple entrance so hard that little tiny Assyrian worshipers and priests started to fall out and stuff untill I came and I shot them all back in and they all started fucking each other because that's what my stuff does. So anyway, my gum was stolen so I decided to try to find out who this ziggurat fucker was. Turns out he doesn't live here anymore. He rented a yacht down in Turkey and doesn't come into the downtown area anymore. So I figured I'd give him a call and see what he was up to 'cuz we haven't hung out since kindergarten. He's a real nice guy and all, he's kind of strange (for a ziggurat) but he's not gay or anything. One time in kindergarten he smoked an entire box of frosted flakes. Wait a second... that reminds me of something... Yeah. Yep. Here it is, I found the picture of the bastard. Turns out the ziggurat I fucked earlier was his mom.

Ziggurat that stole my gum:

Ziggurat's mom:

As you can tell, his mom was a total slut.

[ September 14, 2003, 07:57 PM: Message edited by: Titan ]

09-12-2003, 02:25 AM	#3 (permalink)
Alpha Senior Member Join Date: May 2003 Posts: 1,003 Internets: 82	I sure wish Crastur would make a comeback.
	Gods are but men with immortal souls.

09-12-2003, 02:38 AM	#5 (permalink)
Alpha Senior Member Join Date: May 2003 Posts: 1,003 Internets: 82	That reminds me of Frample... Frample was always picked on. Maybe it was his herpes, maybe the fact his snot was orange, or maybe because he was a Jew. Frample decided that he was going to go take a walk on the beach. Frample wants to be safe so he brings a raincoat... You can never be to sure in Texas, it rains a lot there. As Frample walked he notices a dead bear lying on the beach. Frample went over to it and poked it with a stick. The bear got up because it wasn't really dead, just very tired... Now the bear is pissed so it totally kicked Frample right in the nuts. Then devoured it's Frample's head. Frample died.
	Gods are but men with immortal souls.

09-14-2003, 09:43 PM	#6 (permalink)
Titan Senior Member Join Date: Nov 2002 Posts: 3,698 Internets: 10	Zow. Yorgazmo's Na Flucking Nenius. Nliedes Fand My Splur Blaffing Kaboot Thart Floor Mours. Somebody's ziggurat came over yesterday and stole all of my gum. I know you might be laughing now, but that seriously pissed me off. The last time a ziggurat came over I fucked her in her temple entrance so hard that little tiny Assyrian worshipers and priests started to fall out and stuff untill I came and I shot them all back in and they all started fucking each other because that's what my stuff does. So anyway, my gum was stolen so I decided to try to find out who this ziggurat fucker was. Turns out he doesn't live here anymore. He rented a yacht down in Turkey and doesn't come into the downtown area anymore. So I figured I'd give him a call and see what he was up to 'cuz we haven't hung out since kindergarten. He's a real nice guy and all, he's kind of strange (for a ziggurat) but he's not gay or anything. One time in kindergarten he smoked an entire box of frosted flakes. Wait a second... that reminds me of something... Yeah. Yep. Here it is, I found the picture of the bastard. Turns out the ziggurat I fucked earlier was his mom. Ziggurat that stole my gum: Ziggurat's mom: As you can tell, his mom was a total slut. [ September 14, 2003, 07:57 PM: Message edited by: Titan ]
	I do what the fuck I want.

06-03-2003, 02:40 AM	#1 (permalink)
Orgazmo COME ON YOU YANKS Join Date: Feb 2002 Location: Indiana Posts: 15,668 Internets: 305662	Crastur lived up on a big ass mountain. He was about 5 ft. 3 in. tall and always hunched and shit like that. He also had a big ass beard. IT was white and shit. One day Crastur came down from the top of his big ass mountain and started walking on this big ass path. The bastard was so hunched. What a fucker. Anyway, it's raining and shit like a bitch and lightning yeah, so the crazy fucker takes his fucking pocket knife and throws it straight at a tree. Right at the damned tree! Haha, I'm sure you can imagine that was the last we ever saw of Crastur!

06-03-2003, 12:42 PM	#2 (permalink)
vader521 Senior Member Join Date: Jan 2003 Location: Warsaw Posts: 350 Internets: 10	Crastur that fucker...

09-12-2003, 02:32 AM	#4 (permalink)
Orgazmo COME ON YOU YANKS Join Date: Feb 2002 Location: Indiana Posts: 15,668 Internets: 305662	Didn't you read the story? He threw his knife into the tree! He's not coming back... I could tell you the story of Donkler if you wish, though. Donkler was a real son of a bitch. Yeah he was, a son of a bitch. Anyway, he lived in the middle of a really dense forest and shit because he didn't like to talk and stuff like that. Well, as only Donkler would, one day he went outside to fuck with some trees. You see, he didn't have stores and shit like that, so Donkler used the trees and shit to make his shit...like self sufficiency and shit. Anyway, he went out to fuck with the tree when he spotted a squirrel or something. Donkler, the poor fuck, goes up to the squirrel, quiet as a motherfucker, and picks the guy up. He thinks that the squirrel is going to like flip out and shit when it realizes that it's being fucked with...but it doesn't. Not knowing what the fuck is happening, Donkler actually flips out...thinking that it's a fake squirrel or that something is wrong or shit. I don't know. Anyway, Donkler goes crazy ape and throws the fucking squirrel right into the ground. Turns out that was a bad idea because the squirrel was really a knife, and the ground was really Donkler's foot. Yeah, the fucker threw a knife right into his foot. What a dumbass.