The LAW SCHOOL Chronicles

[Ironic Mustache]

The aforementioned facsimile comment may have been surpassed today by the pronunciation of the word, "paradigm," as (spelled phonetically of course), "pair-uh-dig-um." I now question whether or not I completely imagined the application process. They may have just auto-admitted everyone who has heard the words "law" and "school" in the same sentence.

[Beebs]

You gotta be fucking kidding me.

[Ironic Mustache]

It surprised me as well. There is an interesting array of different forms of intelligence in law school. I go to school with some people who are geniuses in physics but can't analyze a simple case to save their life. In contrast, there are people who are great at analyzing complex legal matters but can't, (this actually happened during class) locate Washington on a map. IT'S TWO FUCKING STATES NORTH OF US.

[Beebs]

Some are physics geniuses, you can find Washington on a map.

Good fuckin luck.

[Ironic Mustache]

Knowing a lot about physics and being able to locate Washington are pretty equivalent skills when applied towards law school. Not to mention the fact these little physics dorks are around 23 with zero work experience and even less social skills. The interview process is going to murder them when we start competing for jobs. As long as I perform half as well as I'm supposed to, there's a 100% chance that I'll have a 5% chance of getting a job when I graduate.

[THEINCREDIBLEdork]

I'm calling bullshit. What's the point of making up these lame stories? Why are you learning american geography in law school?

[Ironic Mustache]

For the same reason that they made us learn math in elementary school. "Because I said so."

[Ironic Mustache]

I was nursing a hangover today and was what I thought was, "not fully prepared," for a Civil Procedure class, when I was "randomly" called on first. What being called on first means is that the professor has chosen you as the candidate that he will attempt to slowly, intellectually rape for the next 75 minutes. This particular course is taught by one of the notoriously cruelest professors at my school, in by far my weakest subject. Despite all of this, I must have channeled AP or something because I fucking killed it. I had maybe two total missteps (not disasters, just not exactly the answer he was looking for) with the hypotheticals, of which there were roughly 5; each of which having 2-3 questions. That percentage might not sound incredible enough to be bragging about but I assure you that it is. I aced all of the straight forward material (issue, rule, analysis, etc.). The hypos are complicated as shit and more often than not, have no real correct answer. You have around 10-15 seconds to attempt to formulate an argument to an issue that the Supreme Court has been unable to answer for over a hundred years. While attempting this, you also have 65 people staring at you who just can't fucking wait for your demise. If you can accomplish this while not looking like a retard during the process, you basically win. If you wreck it like a boss like I did, you're a god. (I might be exaggerating about the god stuff. I'm just a little excited about the near-guarantee that I won't have to go through this ordeal in this class again this semester).

Since AP is the only person still reading this thread, more details:
Shaffer v. Heitner (applying International Shoe to quasi in rem jurisdiction cases using intangible property as attachment).

tl;dr: Ironic Mustache got singled out in class all day and wrecked shit despite being hungover, slightly unprepared, and hating the class/professor with a passion.

[f3lix]

[angry pancake]

How does this effect your grade? If it doesn't, then well, good for not making an ass of yourself. You will have plenty of time to do so.

[Ironic Mustache]

It only affects my grade by not having it lowered. This particular prick has been known to drop overall grades for what he deems "unpreparedness" during class discussion. Though there's a possibility that this might just mean that you're completely unprepared (didn't read the case).

Originally Posted by angry pancake

well, good for not making an ass of yourself. You will have plenty of time to do so.

This part sort of came true today when I got my first writing assignment back (which thankfully doesn't count as part of my grade).

You warned me that I would be illiterate and have caught the correct.

[angry pancake]

You'll get to make an ass of yourself plenty of times in class. Then there's the real world outside. The sting quits after awhile.

[Ironic Mustache]

So much to look forward to!

[Repugnant Abomination]

I like to picture IM sitting on AP's lap all wide-eyed and eager as AP gently, but firmly, prepares him for a life practicing law. Sure, they horse around and goof on each other every now and again, but there's also paternal moments filled with earnestness, pride, and a quiet resignation that someday IM will be too big for his lap.

Cherish these moments, sirs!

[Mr. Blonde]

I am a fan of the all caps in this thread title.

[Ironic Mustache]

I'm not sure where those caps came from but I like that they're now there.

[THEINCREDIBLEdork]

I know, it really underlines the fact that this thread is about law school. I like that.

[Ironic Mustache]

I agree. The otherwise ambiguous nature of the title could have been confusing and I like that people know for sure that this thread is about law school, law school related subjects, and the fact that I'm in law school.

[Repugnant Abomination]

More like lawl school chronicles.

[Ironic Mustache]

Officially halfway through the first semester. Don't really care anymore. Being excited about law school has officially worn off. It's not that I don't want to be a lawyer; it's that I don't want to be a law student. My outrageous study sessions have collapsed to 3-4 hours per night with similar results. Law school is a ridiculous menagerie of bullshit. I've gotten proficient at weeding through it.

AP: I'm basically skimming cases now and reading pre-written briefs for class. I've turned 90% of my focus to my outlines and practice tests. Anything else I should worry about?

[angry pancake]

I don't know about using the canned briefs. Never used them in law school. I just read for class and took a few notes here and there. But the reading should speed up the more familiar you become with this type of material. It is not unlike learning a foreign language. This is usually around the time when it starts to click for many people.

Everybody is different, but as much as I didn't use the commercial briefs, I liked a couple of the commercial outlines for review. Particularly those from West and then BarBri (I think West Bar Review is long gone so they might not make those materials any longer). Regardless, I never made any outlines. Started a couple of times trying to make them and then gave up. They always ended up looking like the TOC of the book. I wasn't going to learn the material through outlines, but if I already knew it, then those were a great help for review.

I can't really say much about practice tests. Those (I don't think) didn't exist back in my day. I'm not sure those would have done me any good either. I'm presuming your grade in most classes is from one comprehensive final. At the halfway point, would you still have to learn the other half of the material before you can practice test it? I'm probably not fully picturing what you're doing for practice tests and how those work.

You will always have to read for class. It's just that the process of going through the material speeds up. What's relevant and not relevant is much easier to spot so that makes sorting through everything easier. But it still has to be done. I don't know of any shortcuts through that process.

But you've probably noticed that a lot of your classmates quit writing out case briefs for class. Or it's become 100 times simplified to where it's a few scribbled notes. Or done in the book itself. You all have pretty much figured out that trying to memorize everything is a waste of time and can't be done.

Glad to see that you're figuring out what does and does not work for you. Now you still have half a semester to catch your breath and get comfortable before you find out in December that whatever it is that worked for you did not even begin to adequately prepare you for your finals.

[Ironic Mustache]

Originally Posted by angry pancake

Glad to see that you're figuring out what does and does not work for you. Now you still have half a semester to catch your breath and get comfortable before you find out in December that whatever it is that worked for you did not even begin to adequately prepare you for your finals.

Awesome.

[Repugnant Abomination]

Just so you guys know I'm expecting free law advice for life.

[THEINCREDIBLEdork]

Originally Posted by Repugnant Abomination

Just so you guys know I'm expecting free law advice for life.

And I expect free writing advice.

Just kidding, you suck at writing and can't even finish a book.

[Ironic Mustache]

Law school is 90% bullshit. Rules are rules are rules. The rest is appealing to your professors' egos. Figuring out what your teachers want you to know for class is essential for class and class alone. Other than that, rules are rules.

Upside: I've recently discovered that I can pretty much not go to Torts at all anymore. No attendance, no relevant info, open book/notes exam, rules are rules are rules. As of yesterday I've officially not been in Torts lecture more often than I have.