You just know that when the Financial Advisor analyzed her "predicament" he was probably thinking, "Hmm... after looking at her expenses I think I might know what's going wrong -- SHE'S A FUCKING IDIOT."
Seriously, who spends $150 per month on a cell phone bill? There are plans out there that offer unlimited minutes and texting for well under $100. Also, why in the world does she need a $120 per month internet and tv package? She could get basic cable and broadband for well under $75 -- or, better yet, cut the fucking cable-tv and get dial-up for $10 per month.
Someone should find her phone number and give her a call. Once she's on the line, inform her that you have a solution to her problems. When she seems interested, tell her you just invented a time-machine that will allow her to go back in time and rectify her mistakes. Then she can teleport back to the present time and enjoy a debt-free life. The time machine will only cost her $2000.
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