Superpowers Resurrected

[Warwick]

Back in the golden days, when nubblies.net was still nubblies.com, there lived a poll in the lower portion of the main page. Rotated periodically, it was oftentimes the kindling used to spark the flame of great conversation both on and off the boards. It is the subject of one of these very polls which tonight I resurrect for all of us to enjoy... with no further ado.

Join me ladies and gentlemen on a ride... a ride into the imagination of the soul. Picture yourself with your eyes closed, your back to your matress, mind drifting into the state between conciousness and fantasy. As the transformation is occuring, a man small in stature appears. This man, while gesturing toward his groin, whispers

come close, my son, for I have a proposition in which you may find interest...

wiggle my manmeat's purple bulldog cheeks and, in return, you shall forever find yourself to be enhanced by a single superpower of your choosing.

Be it wisdom, be it flight,
be it clairvoyance, be it might
polish my balls and you will see
the true nature of my integrity.
Fear not, this rifle has no need to fire
a simple finger tickle is all I require
if you wield a razor and shear me for fun
the number of powers recieved increases by one
so if your gluttonous heart continues to crave
simply lather the pouch and give me a shave
four powers, you say?
it can be received
but you must understand
full erection must be achieved
all powers you want I will not deny
but I must shoot hot cum directly into your eye

[Orgazmo]

There are a few thing to analyze before making a decision in this poll.

Firstly, Warwick appears in the reader's mind just as they're drifting off to sleep. That said, there's a very good chance that this is all fantasy; part of the reader's imagination completely.

There are two ways to look at said situation:

One can either shrug it off, saying "Oh well, if it's just a dream it doesn't matter...I'll take the hot cum in my eye for all of the powers." While others could say, "If it doesn't matter, I'm not going to go through the practices of pleasing this mysterious fellow, whether it be real or complete fantasy. The powers will only last me for the span of a dream; that's not worth waking up to thoughts of what I've done with this man." I suppose both aspects are rational; however, they lead a person to vote with an "all or none" attitude. Since there isn't an option for receiving zero superpowers, though...all seems to be the choice here.

Assuming that we're not dealing with complete fantasy, the mysteriousness of this character should weigh in the reader's mind as they ponder which decision to make. The fellow appears out of thin air...and is quite an odd character to say the least. He's claimed over and over again that he is the real deal; however, I'm not sure how quickly one should be to trust a fellow in his position.

Considering all of this, I voted to receive all of the powers. Of course, I'm assuming that "all of the powers" does not include the "other" option (common sense). I'm banking on the situation being completely ficticious...but, even if it's not, I'll be left quite a bit of power for a few minutes of homosexuality.

The only draw back to my selection is the possibility of Warwick being a con artist. The situation could be real...and I could be deliver these services while he has no intention of delivering the superpowers. It's the worst case scenario...and a chance I'm willing to take.

Now that we've thoroughly evaluated the decision of how many powers to receive, let us take a look at the most appetizing of the powers. Sure, one could always choose "other" and fill it in with the power of "receiving any power whenever they please." Gay. When looking at the options, the powers of clairvoyance and invisibility stand out as clear forerunners. Both would aid the user with quite a help in daily life, but, in the end, I think invisibility wins out. In a way, invisility can be used to help a person to know almost whatever they please. One could turn invisible to listen in on any conversation that they wanted. While it couldn't be used to tap minds or anything of the like, it certainly could come in handy in the most basic of situations regarding knowledge. Because of this, invisibility is the most desired superpower to me.

How do you all feel about this character and his list?

[BrassMonkees]

I too think this Warwick character is sneaky and tricky, two qualities I tend not to trust. Nevertheless I think it is impossible for me to turn down the chance of having 7 superpowers for a momentary discomfort in my eye.

If only given one power, then I think I would choose the ability to polymorph. This is clearly the best ability because its really like 5 powers in one. You are practically invisible if you make yourself...say a towel in a locker room. Its just as good, probably even a little better, than just being invisible. you can also have super-human strength if you became say an elephant. You could fly if you became a bird. You could have x-ray vision be simply become an x-ray machine. Polymorphing is really a beautiful thing. It wins my vote, hands down.

[Orgazmo]

It sounds to me like our friend Warwick needs to clarify some of the powers. When I thought of the polymorph power, I imagined that it only pertained to the user's appearance. Once someone has polymorphed into something, I don't think that the attributes of that thing would be kept. If they were kept, it only makes sense that all of that things attributes would be used...and all of the attributes that the superpower holder had pre-polymorph would be lost. That would mean that someone polymorphing into a bird would, according to your line of thought, obtain the ability to fly; however, they would lose the ability to reason, talk, and, of course, to unpolymorph back into themself (since birds can't polymorph).

He mentions wisdom in the rhyme, but you can't vote for it, what the fuck?

So far, I am the only "other" vote.

[ninjaface]

I decided to go with teleportation. But only under the assumption that I could teleport where ever I wanted(with-in reason) and wouldn't have to worry about dying from it. I'm talking about if I decide to teleport behind a wall, only to find its solid concrete. Death by teleportation into concrete would suck. I suppose it would still be a good power even if I had to worry about that sort of thing. Also, I would need the ability to take something (aside from myself and my clothes) from one area of teleportation to the other simply by holding onto it. If the super power does not meet my specifications, I would choose a different one. Teleporting across country would be great. Either that or into a bank vault.

[Scarlet]

I did wonder why somethings were in the story but not on the list my first choice was to not want any powers but since that was clearely not a choice then I picked all the powers. I ended up choosing clairvoyance, With all that said im not sure if would have really trusted this strange little man.

[Orgazmo]

We really need some clarification for all of the powers. Warwick, if you expect a reasonable response to your proposition, I request concrete definitions of each of the powers available.