Do niggers go to heaven?

[angry pancake]

Strange thing today. The Dallas area has been closed since Tuesday for weather/super bowl. Which means I've been home in the afternoons a couple of times the last few days. It appears that the jehovas witness use this as prime recruiting time. When the bell rang today interrupting my netflix time I answered to find on the porch of pancake, two of the fattest niggeresses ever. After 30 seconds or so of wondering how they got through security it appeared obvious they were doing jahovas work. Somehow one of the fat fucks got to asking me if I wanted to go to heaven. Instead of schooling her on how such a place doesn't exist, and it's fucking cold out, I simply asked if she was going to be at this kingdom. After receiving her affirmation that she would indeed be there, I kindly informed her that I would hardly call any place that had niggers around as "heaven." Becoming annoyed I informed then to get out of the community as we have gates up to prevent this shit. I then called the security folks at the front while the niggeresses went on rambling about their right to free speech on my front porch or some shit like that.

Really though if there were such a heavenly afterlife, why would God wreck it by allowing in niggers? Seems like a solid case against the idea of the existence of this kingdom in the sky.

[Saint DH]

No they don't go to heaven. I'm pretty sure it says that in the bible.

[angry pancake]

Do they have their own "nigger heaven?"

[THEINCREDIBLEdork]

Clouds made of collard greens and angels with fried chicken wings.

[Saint DH]

Yes, they do have their own heaven. Otherwise known as "subsidized heaven" the angels from the normal heaven pay for it. It was a nice place until drugs, violence and vandalism started running rampant. Oh who am I kidding...it was never a nice place.

[angry pancake]

I'm trying to picture nigros wearing their halos crooked and all having gold teeth. Probably purple crushed velvet robes too.

[Repugnant Abomination]

You guys are terrible.

[Orgazmo]

This thread is R and I.

R and I stand for Racist and Insensitive.

[angry pancake]

Driving back from the albertsons grocery. The same two walking around. I thought they were supposed to hate cold.

[heurisdick]

They do go to heaven. The bible clearly states everyone receives a new body after they die. How much you wanna bet those don't come in black?

[angry pancake]

Originally Posted by heurisdick

They do go to heaven. The bible clearly states everyone receives a new body after they die. How much you wanna bet those don't come in black?

I'll take that bet for $100. I'll also throw out there for another $100 that there is no heaven.

If niggers go to heaven, I'll pass on heaven. White power!!!! So how are you celebrating black history month?

[Saint DH]

"And he had caused the cursing to come upon [the Lamanites], yea, even a sore cursing, because of their iniquity. For behold, they had hardened their hearts against him, and they had become like unto a flint; wherefore, as they were white, and exceedingly fair and delightsome, that they might not be enticing unto my people the Lord God did cause a skin of blackness to come upon them."

I think all that's left to say is...BOOM

[angry pancake]

"and the Lord was drunken from thee fermented fruits from the vine and said to his people in the form of a shrub upon flame: thou shalt forsake those darkies as thy will stealest from thou. Then on the day after the Lord woke from his drunkenness and smoked a bowl from the garden with the serpent. The serpent sayeth "let there be tits." and there were tits. And the Mandingo man asketh of the lord "Lord, where art all thee white bitches?" and the Mandingo was therefore on his search for the white bitch, regardless of hers fatness and ugliness. This is the word of the Lord. Praise be to AP.

[Ironic Mustache]

Citation needed.

[Saint DH]

It's from the book of Mormon...so yeah.