Yes

can you guys try not being niggerpisses for one goddamn minute and here me out? ok.... I forgot wat I was going to say.

fuck.

Hear*

what*

fuck you

Shit fuck man, I think I drank too much whiskey tonight.

I drink alone tonight.

Dave racked up a 23 drink debt in Drinking Fifa tonight. He paid in Jose shots (1 shots = 12 drinks). Then he racked up 32 the next game.

He's such a faggot.

Then he fucked a guy in my bathroom. The fucking guy carries around a guy with him to fuck wherever he goes. Mandoer elite. That's f3lix.

Holy fuck. I've been drinkin a bit tonight guys, but I feel better than I've felt in months.

It's no secret that I've thought I was dying. Not being able to take full deep breaths is a horrible fucking feeling. But for the first time since shortly after I stopped smoking, I can take a full, deep breath. If I could describe to you in words how amazing this feels right now I would be a fucking god damn wordsmith because the feeling is incredible. Absolutely fucking incredible. Euphoric/orgasmic is the closest I can come to describing it.

I haven't been happier than I am right now in a long, long time. I kinda thought I might be dying. To come to terms with death, then rebound, and feel like you have hope of living is magical. To feel strong again. To smell the summer smells that I haven't smelled all summer...well it's fucking god damn amazing guys. I've had like 4 whiskey and coke drinks tonight...but I feel great. SO much hope at the Dirty Harry house tonight. I don't wanna go to sleep!

I still feel a lot better today. I'm not sure what happened, but my lungs are feeling incredible still today. I really can't explain how great this is.

Also, I never came to terms with death, obviously. Nor did I ever really think I was dying. My paranoid mind was just worried that I might be dying.

I'm dying, just like the girl in that poem, but slower, and with an erection.

The being able to breathe again is a good feeling. Broke a rib a few years back while performing acts of badassness. I sucked not being able to breathe at full strength.

WHO HERE LOVES A NICE, FAT PIECE OF HAM? I know I do.

I just had a lengthy conversation with a chick about my HSA account and why my card wasn't working correctly.

At the end of the conversation, she asked me if there were any other issues or if there was anything else she could do for me.

I paused for a moment and replied, "No Stephanie. You've been a dove. Thank you."

What the fuck does that mean?

Christ.

Jesus, back to back messages in the Drunk Things thread over a 5 month period. Maybe it's time I re-assess my values.

I called Geico (while high) earlier and had a similar but different experience. I called them to change from my Chase account to my FCU account and something went wrong and the whole process ended up being way too labor intensive for my state. The rep was like...over-courteous and just a bit too much for me, and I told her this at the end of the call.

Jerk.

I didn't insult her. She asked if she answered all my questions and all that and I was like "yeah, you were very professional, almost too professional, (dual laughter), but thank you anyways, you did a great job"

I really don't like being waited on like I'm more important than I am. She was cranking the customer service out at like an 11. This is great, of course, but given my state, just a bit much. I'm sure I ruined her night.

Right. Like a jerk.

:rageokay: